No matter where he was, he always felt like he was on the outside looking in. From Earth, space seemed far away and out of reach, and from the colonies, space seemed to consume him in its endlessness. Either way very little kept him from letting go and floating off never to be seen again.

The sweet ping of crystal glasses drew Heero back to the moment. He turned from the view out of the window to the small gathering of his friends and their new acquaintances. He was on L4 to celebrate Trowa's birthday. Even though the date of Trowa's birth was unknown, Quatre had designated one for him.

"He was born in the spring of the year," Quatre had said with much surety when he had invited Heero to the party.

Heero didn't feel much like celebrating, despite the war being years over and his friends finding new reasons to enjoy life. He had joined the Earth Sphere Unified Nations' elite intelligence agency and was traveling a lot between the space colonies and Earth as one of its top agents. He was never in one place more than a few weeks, but that suited him. Destroying the armaments of war and maintaining the peace kept him focused and moving.

"Happy birthday!" the well wishers said, raising their glasses to Trowa.

Quatre beamed as Trowa leaned down to kiss him. Theirs was a success story. Through the adversity of war they had found each other, lost each other, and found each other again. Now they formed a true partnership in life and love as business partners in Winner Corporation-with Quatre at the helm and Trowa at his side. Heero was pleased for them. They had made it through the fire.

After cutting the cake, Trowa brought a piece to Heero. "You didn't have to come."

"It's your birthday."

"Designated birthday," Trowa corrected with a smile.

Heero nodded and took a bite of the cake. It was rich, dark chocolate and had a curious way of reminding him of someone he knew long ago.

"You haven't kept in touch." Trowa frowned at the distant look in Heero's eyes.

"We're all busy these days."

"Never too busy to hear from friends."

"You're right, of course," Heero said, and looked over at Quatre who was mingling with the other guests in his luxurious penthouse. "Hang onto him with both hands. You two have something special."

Trowa blinked. He was used to getting advice from his friend on occasion, but these words were seared with melancholy. "You all right, Heero?"

"Yeah," he said with a small smile. "Now you'd better get back to Quatre before he misses you."

Trowa nodded and went to Quatre, putting his arm around his lover's waist.

Heero watched them as he felt a wave of sorrow and joy wash through him. It was always this way when he was around Trowa and Quatre. Maybe that's why he kept his distance, to avoid the feeling that he had missed an opportunity for happiness. He had let it slip away, but at the time he hadn't known that was his only chance. It had been during the war and they were so very young. Surely there would be time for that... later.

He turned his eyes back to the window and the blackness of space. It was so vast, so limitless. Just like the answers he sought.

~ ~ ~

He wanted to rush back into his work, but he stayed until the end of the party and accepted his friends' offer to spend the night. They hadn't seen each other in nearly a year, and it seemed a waste to spend only a few hours together.

They breakfasted the next morning in the solarium. Trowa's and Quatre's penthouse was located in the same towering building as Winner Industries. Heero had wondered aloud if that was such a good idea-to live where you worked. The solarium was their favorite room, and was one of the reasons the penthouse took up two floors instead of one. The potted trees were fifty feet high and surrounded by such an abundance of greenery and flowers that it seemed Quatre had renounced his time in the desert for good.

After their meal, Heero returned to the guest bedroom to grab his duffle bag. He had left his mobile communication device on the bed and it was blinking with a new message. He flipped open the device and saw that a call had come from Preventers Headquarters in Bremen. It was from Agent Chang Wufei.

"Heero, a warehouse of MDs was discovered on Colony V08744 at Lagrange Point L2," Wufei's video message said. "How it went unnoticed all this time is a mystery, but we need you there as soon as possible. A Preventers task force is on its way to secure the premises and await your orders." Wufei's communication was succinct as usual, so Heero was surprised when after a short pause his colleague had more to say. "There's something else... it's from the Missing Persons Division."

Heero's breath caught. "Missing persons..."

"In compliance with ESUN's War Retribution Act, the General Hospital on L2 forwarded a report relating to OZ's use of the hospital during the war. According to the initial findings hundreds of patients were brought there by OZ transport. Many identified only as John or Jane Doe. I think it's a lead worth checking and thought you should know. Chang out."

Heero blinked as he sorted out this new information. He would head to L2 to begin the long process of securing and safely disarming and dismantling the Mobile Dolls, but he wouldn't have time to investigate this new lead. It was the first lead they had had in fifteen months, and the caress of hope opened his mind and made him want to set aside his duty just this once.

Could the answer he had been searching for be found on L2?

~ ~ ~

"I can't do this alone," he said, standing in the middle of the Winner Corporation's conference room.

Quatre and Trowa and a group of architects were pouring over plans for a new space port on Colony X18999 when Heero forced his way into their meeting. Now they all stared at the young Preventers' agent for the unusual interruption.

"Is something wrong?" Quatre asked, alarmed.

"I received a communication from Wufei this morning. It's a lead we should follow up on."

"A lead?" Quatre's voice hitched. He knew without asking what sort of lead Heero meant. "After all this time?"

"I have new orders, and can't pursue this," Heero said.

Quatre nodded, understanding that Heero was asking him to take charge. "Of course. Tell us what we need to do."

After replaying the last part of Wufei's message, the three former Gundam pilots looked at each other, hopeful yet reluctant to admit it.

"You think Duo was brought to that hospital?" Trowa asked.

It was almost taboo to mention Duo's name aloud. It pained all of them how he had disappeared during the war never to be seen again. With the most powerful resources at their command it had shamed and frustrated them not to solve the mystery of their missing friend.

"There's no way of knowing until we check it out," Heero said.

Trowa nodded. "Then we shouldn't waste anymore time."

~ ~ ~

Hilde Schbeiker had witnessed Duo's last battle. Duo in Deathscythe had fought Trant in Wing Zero... and lost. Deathscythe had self-destructed.

Duo's story might have ended there if Hilde had not seen what happened next. Despite the destructive, shuttering explosion of Deathscythe, Duo had survived and OZ had taken him away. That was more than five years ago, and the last time anyone had seen Duo Maxwell.

The Preventers' Missing Persons Division had so many case files that it would take ten times the resources to make a dent in them. Duo was one in thousands who had gone missing during the war. Their most conclusive lead had been that he was briefly detained by OZ military forces on Colony C102. After that he could have been taken anywhere across the great expanse of space-another colony, Mars, Earth, or some remote outpost.

It seemed the Gundam pilots had only just met, only just formed their new alliance when one among them was ripped from their ranks. Duo had made such an impression with his exuberant personality and fierce piloting and fighting skills that everyone had felt the loss. For a time they doubted they could win the war without him, but they had to keep fighting, having little chance to make inquiries and less to wonder if he had survived. And then, when the war was won, and Duo hadn't appeared, the search began in earnest. The pilots used every contact, every trick they knew to gather information. Still, this lead was the first in over a year.

The search for Duo had kept the remaining pilots relatively close. The majority of their communications involved passing information that had been uncovered in the vast databanks of OZ operations or through other, more elusive channels. If anyone could find a needle in a haystack it would be the former Gundam pilots. But the more time that passed without confirmation of his whereabouts or demise, the more painful it became to mention Duo's name.

~ ~ ~

Quatre and Trowa shook hands with Doctor Hewitt as they entered the man's office. He was the new administrator for the General Hospital on L2, having taken the position six months ago. They were directed to sit in arm chairs in front of his desk.

"There is a handful of staff that worked here during the war," he said, leaning against the desk. "The OZ program I mentioned in my report was not openly discussed."

"No one questioned what OZ was doing?" Quatre asked.

"It wasn't safe to question OZ, and besides, we're doctors. We're here for the patients, no matter how they get here."

"Are the OZ patient records available?" Trowa asked.

"Agent Yuy notified my office this morning that you would be coming, so I've asked my staff to copy the files of every patient that was admitted during the war. It might be more than you need. You can wait here or in the cafeteria, and I will have you paged when the copies are ready."

"Thank you, doctor," Quatre said, standing to shake the man's hand. "We appreciate your willingness to share such private information. Be assured the records will remain confidential."

"There were dissenting voices, but most of the board of directors felt strongly about working with ESUN to heal the scars the war left behind."

"That's good to hear," Quatre said. "We'll wait in the cafeteria so that you can get back to your work."

"I'll have my assistant escort you."

As it turned out, Doctor Hewitt's assistant, Ms. Bell was one of the remaining staffers from the war years and was eager to share her experiences.

"So you were aware of the patients brought here by OZ?" Trowa asked.

"Oh, yes. They tried to pass them off as war wounded, but one of the floors of the hospital was kept entirely off limits."

"All the OZ patients were kept on a special floor?"

"No. It's hard to explain, since there was so much secrecy, but it seemed only a handful of them were taken there."

"The most seriously injured?" Quatre asked.

The woman shook her head. "Some had obvious wounds. Most had a blank look on their faces. Kind of a soulless look." She shivered visibly. "I don't like thinking about it."

Quatre stopped walking and turned to her. "You mean they were shell shocked from battle?"

She shook her head. "Oh, I've seen plenty of that to know it wasn't the same. One of the nurses told me that OZ was experimenting on them."

"What?" Quatre asked, his heartbeat quickening.

"I never heard anything more about it... and I never saw that nurse again."

"What happened to the patients?" Trowa asked.

Ms. Bell shrugged. "When it was obvious the war was coming to an end and OZ had lost, they started destroying records and evacuating their people... and the patients from the secured floor. It was complete chaos here. I lost a lot of friends and co-workers. They either fled or were killed, I suppose. OZ didn't like witnesses."

Quatre looked to Trowa. "Do you think...?"

Trowa shook his head. "Let's hope he wasn't here."

"Are you looking for someone?" she asked.

"Yes, a former comrade," Quatre said.

"Well, I hope you find him."

~ ~ ~

Three hours later, Trowa and Quatre were given seven boxes of copied medical records. It was all the data the hospital had on the OZ patients, and Doctor Hewitt reminded them that many records had been destroyed.

The couple headed back to L4 where they could look over the records in the comfort of their home, before sending them to the Missing Persons Division. Trowa contacted Heero to inform him of their meeting and that they planned to spend the night going through the files. At ten o'clock they were surprised to have Heero at their doorstep.

He came into their penthouse, shrugging out of his Preventers' uniform jacket. "What have you discovered?"

"That OZ brought a lot of patients to L2," Quatre said.

"Shouldn't you be on L2 now?" Trowa asked.

"The warehouse is secured. I'll fly back in the morning."

Trowa and Quatre exchanged a glance. It wasn't like Heero to abandon his post.

"I hope we didn't give you the impression that this is more than we can handle," Quatre said.

Heero surveyed the open boxes and stacks of papers in the living room. "There's a lot to read and with three of us it'll go faster."

"You've got us there," Trowa said with a chuckle. "I'll brew some coffee."

"Good, thank you," Heero said, heading for the work area.

In minutes, they were settled into chairs and the couch pouring over page after page of medical records. They sorted the files into categories such as deceased, John Doe, and transferred-all relating to the patient status as best they could determine.

By three o'clock in the morning they had consumed several pots of coffee and cartons of Chinese take-away. They were finished checking the records, but had found no conclusive evidence that any of the patients were Duo Maxwell. Still, Heero compiled a list of the facilities where each male patient had been transferred at the close of the war.

"So many lives lost," Quatre said, leaning against Trowa on the couch.

Heero stared at the lovers who acted even less inhibited after a long night's work. He couldn't fault them for snuggling close in their own home, or for being comfortable enough around him to do so. "Thank you for getting these files." He got up from his chair and grabbed his jacket. If he hurried, he could be back on L2 by dawn. "I'll have Missing Persons send an image of Duo to each facility on our list. Maybe someone has seen him."

"But there wasn't anything that indicated Duo was at the General Hospital," Quatre said, frowning.

"Maybe there's a connection we don't know about. I'll contact you if I hear anything," Heero said and left.

When the door closed, Trowa got up from the couch and stretched. "We should've offered him the guest room again."

"He knows the offer is always good."

Trowa began picking up the empty coffee cups and cartons, but noted how quiet Quatre had become. He looked over to see his lover was staring at the door. "You okay, babe?"

"It's Heero," Quatre said, softly. "He's desperate to find Duo."

"Desperate? I guess we all are," Trowa said, laying a hand on Quatre's shoulder. "You think it's his way of coping with the war? It hasn't been easy for any of us to move on."

Quatre turned his clear blue eyes up at Trowa. "Do you think he's changed?"

"We've all changed, but maybe he hasn't had the support the rest of us have."

Quatre nodded, thoughtfully. "Is he seeing anyone?"

"As in dating?" Trowa asked with a laugh.

"Why is it funny?"

"He just doesn't seem like a guy who's ready for a relationship. Remember what happened with a certain young princess?"

"I'm sure Heero didn't mean to embarrass her..." Quatre's words trailed off as he recalled Relena's very public declaration of affection for the hero of the war.

It seemed a given that those two would get together once peace was forged. After Heero had quietly rebuffed the princess, he slipped away to attend college for a year before joining the Preventers.

"We need to make more of an effort to keep in touch with him," Quatre said as he stood.

Trowa smiled, knowing that once Quatre made up his mind it was best not to argue.

~ ~ ~

Three days later, the sound of the phone startled Trowa and Quatre from their sleep.

"Yes?" Trowa asked, picking up the phone.

"It's Heero."

Trowa pressed the speaker button and set the receiver down. "It's half past four, Heero. Is everything all right?"

"We've got another lead."

Quatre sat up, rubbing his eyes. "You've found Duo?"

"Not verified. One of the institutions on Earth contacted Missing Persons. They have a John Doe with a strong likeness to Duo."

"Oh, great Allah!" Quatre threw his arms around Trowa. "We'll leave on the first shuttle."

There was silence at the other end of the line.

"Heero?" Trowa asked. "Did you hear that? Quatre and I will go to Earth to check this lead."

"Right."

Quatre stared at the phone, wondering at his friend's clipped response. "Are you still on L2, Heero?"

"Hn. The disarmament of the Dolls has begun, but it will be weeks before this phase of the operation is complete."

"Is it necessary for you to stay there?" Quatre asked.

"Until I receive new orders, yes."

"Isn't there a second in command who can take over for a few days?"

"Perhaps."

Even from this great distance, Quatre sensed Heero's conflicted emotions. "It would be good for you to join us."

There was a long silence, and Quatre was about to ask if Heero was still on the line when he spoke up.

"I'll see what I can do. For now, here is the information you'll need. The Institute for Mental Illness is outside of Paris, France."

"A mental institution?" Quatre gasped.

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," Heero said, calmly. "We don't know if Duo is there. Someone at the Institute merely stated that one of the patients with an OZ transfer has a likeness to the image that was sent."

Obviously, Heero thought this lead was a big deal or he wouldn't be calling at this hour, but he was trying to keep things in perspective. Quatre, on the other hand, was eager to embrace this new hope.

"We'll meet you there, Heero," Quatre said with practiced authority. "Rendezvous with us at the Paris shuttle port."

~ ~ ~

When Heero arrived at the shuttle port, Quatre gave him an emotional hug.

"Easy," Heero said, gently removing himself from the embrace.

"It's just so incredible to think... we might find Duo," Quatre said. His hands were shaking with a mix of nerves and excitement.

Heero opened his mouth to tell Quatre that there was no reason to believe they would find Duo today or any other day, but clamped his mouth shut. This was the best lead they had ever had. There was no point in dashing hopes when there had been so little hope for so long. It was a beautiful thing, after all, and if Quatre had hope now, it was more than they had had at the end of the war five years ago.

The trio rented a car and drove out of Paris to the countryside where the Institute for Mental Illness was located. The facility was nestled on a 500-acre parkland and consisted of eight, multi-story buildings. The former Gundam pilots were pleased with the setting, but refrained from conversation as they walked along the sidewalk to the main entrance.

Inside, Heero took control, since it was the Preventers who had made contact with the Institute. The lead they had gotten was from an anonymous source; not uncommon, but definitely not preferred.

At the reception desk, Agent Yuy showed his identification. "We are investigating a missing person and received a credible tip that he is possibly a John Doe patient here. Is there someone we can speak to about him?"

"You probably want to speak with Doctor Gies, but he's off-site until later this afternoon," the receptionist said. "He's the chief of staff, and also personally works with our toughest cases."

"Hn," Heero said with a nod. "Could another doctor give us a tour while we wait for Doctor Gies?"

"Let me call the doctors' lounge and see if anyone is available."

"Thank you."

They waited nearly thirty minutes before a young man in a white lab coat met them in the lobby.

"I'm Doctor Finch," he said, holding out his hand in greeting.

Quatre immediately took the man's hand in a firm shake. "I'm Quatre Raberba Winner, and this is Trowa Barton and Heero Yuy." The men exchanged handshakes.

"You're investigating one of our John Does?" the doctor asked.

"Yes," Heero said. "He was a colleague of ours and we're following a lead that he may be a patient here."

"I see. What can you tell me about him?"

"His name is Duo Maxwell." Heero opened his mobile to show the doctor the image of Duo. He had uploaded it when the Missing Persons Division had sent the digital file to dozens of medical facilities.

"He doesn't look familiar, but we have hundreds of patients. Doctor Gies would probably know if he's here."

"Do you know when the doctor will be returning?" Quatre asked.

"Another hour or so," he said as he looked at his watch. "He's giving a seminar in Paris. I can take you to his waiting area, and give you a tour on the way."

"Thank you. We would appreciate that," Quatre said.

~ ~ ~

~ Inciting ~

The doctor escorted them through a keyed door and into the heart of the facility. He explained the work of the Institute and its leading role as a reformer in the treatment of the emotionally disabled. Doctor Finch had been on staff for two years and specialized in group therapy.

As they came to a juncture where four hallways met, he asked if they would like to see one of the group recreation areas. Now that they were in, they wanted to search every room on the medical campus, and would take any opportunity to do so. He brought them into a large room used for leisure. Twenty-five men and women were seated around the room wearing t-shirts or cardigan sweaters, sweatpants and slippers. The room was pleasant with big picture windows which let in the bright afternoon sunlight, and gave a spectacular view of the grounds.

Even as the doctor led them across the room, Quatre's eyes wandered, searching for Duo. Many of the patients were watching television, while others played checkers, or admired the variety of birds at the feeder outside. There were several nurses on hand to interact with the patients and to monitor them.

"These are the best adjusted patients. No one with a history of violence is allowed in here." The doctor gestured around the room. "I don't suppose your colleague is here?"

Three pairs of desperate eyes scanned the room and settled on a head of long, brown hair. Quatre stepped forward, his eyes wide as saucers and his heart thumping in his chest. He walked over to see the patient's face... and frowned. "It's not him." He turned away to hide the tears that formed at his great disappointment. Trowa was at Quatre's side in an instant, putting an arm around his shoulder.

"I'm sorry," Doctor Finch said. "I guess you will have to wait for Doctor Gies. It would be good to have one less John Doe on our hands."

"One less?" Heero asked. "How many do you have?"

"About thirty."

"Can we see them?" Trowa asked.

"That would be difficult to arrange. They're scattered throughout our facility."

"But Doctor Gies could arrange it?" Trowa asked.

"Of course." The doctor's brow furrowed as he looked to the patient Quatre had thought was their friend. "May I see the photo again?"

Heero grabbed his mobile and opened the file with Duo's image. "Is there something about him you recognize?"

"Not exactly. Does your friend have long hair like the man there?" He pointed to the patient.

"He did," Heero said. "You can see part of his braid in the photo."

"How long was it?"

"It went down to his waist," Quatre said, his eyes brightening. "Do you have a patient with a braid?"

"No, but there is another male patient with very long hair. Only a few of our male patients have long hair, so that's why I'm remembering it."

"May we see him?" Quatre asked.

"He's one of Doctor Gies's patients, so we would need his permission. But I'm sure Zero Two has hair down to his waist."

"Zero Two?" Heero asked, his heart skipping a beat.

"Yes," Doctor Finch said with a smile. "I hope you don't find that name odd, but when he came to us after the war, on the form where his name should have been was the number-Zero Two. The nurses thought it would be better to call him that than John Doe."

"Where did he arrive from?" Trowa asked.

"One of the colonies, I believe, but I would have to look at his file to be certain."

"Where is he now?" Quatre asked.

"He's too unpredictable to mix with the other patients, so he's kept in another wing."

Heero stepped forward, grabbing the doctor by the front of his coat. "Where is he?"

The doctor's eyes widened. "I--I don't know exactly."

Heero's grip tightened.

"I-I could find out... Maybe Doctor Phelps would know. J-just a moment," the doctor sputtered.

"Do it," Heero said, his voice deadly.

The man gulped and Heero slowly released him. Doctor Finch stepped over to a phone and after several minutes returned with the information they needed. He straightened his coat and kept his distance from Heero. "He's in a secured recreation area. But we can't see him without authorization."

Heero pointed to the Preventers patch on his jacket. "Here's your authorization."

The doctor gave a nervous nod. "Follow me."

~ ~ ~

They exited the building and walked through a colonnaded breezeway to another building. This part of the facility had a much higher level of security. There were keypads, retinal scans, and guards posted at intervals. Though the guards did not carry guns, Heero found their presence disconcerting.

The open, sunny rooms of the previous building were replaced by prison like cells. On either side of the corridor were barred and locked metal doors, and behind the doors the screams of the insane.

Quatre cringed and his steps slowed. "I don't think I can do this."

Trowa took hold of his hand. "We've come this far..."

"But I can feel their pain," Quatre said, bringing his free hand up to his heart.

Trowa's impulse was to take his lover in his arms, but they needed to keep moving. "We have to do this, Quatre. All of us."

Quatre nodded as the screams cut through him. He prayed that Duo was not one of those tortured souls.

At the next security checkpoint there was a work area with desks and locked cabinets filled with medical supplies. Behind the main desk was a guard in the standard brown uniform of the Institute. He was a large man with broad shoulders. Doctor Finch explained that he needed to see Zero Two.

"Only Doctor Gies can give clearance for that," the guard said.

"These gentlemen are on official business from the Earth Sphere Unified Nations. They may be able to identify Zero Two. And if so, Doctor Gies will be most grateful to them."

The man seemed to consider this, his eyes settling on Heero's uniform. "Sign in," he said, shoving a clip board across the desk.

Each one signed their name and then looked to the man again. Heero was growing impatient and was about to force his way through when the guard grabbed a set of keys from a lock box and nodded for them to follow. "He's in the rec room."

This recreational room was nothing like the one they had seen moments ago. This one was behind a locked metal door. The guard peeked through a small window in the door. "Yep, still in there."

There was no sound coming from the room. "Are you sure someone's in there?" Quatre asked.

The guard nodded. "The doctor has given strict orders that no one is allowed to touch this patient. Even the aides have to sedate him before he can be bathed."

"Why is that?" Quatre asked with deep concern.

"He doesn't play well with others. Gets violent when he's touched." The guard shrugged. "He's a model patient most of the time. Quiet as a mouse." He tapped his keys on the window. "You've got company."

With a turn of the keys in the lock the door hissed open like an entryway in a space dock. The sound sent shivers across Quatre's skin. Memories of battling OZ with Duo at their side suddenly seemed like yesterday. Were they only seconds from finding their long lost friend?

The guard stepped back, but made sure they knew he wouldn't go far should they need help. Heero wanted to set him straight on who did and did not need protecting around here, but decided not to comment.

Their eyes settled quickly on the lone figure seated in a plastic chair at a table. His loosely bound, chestnut colored hair hung down his back to his waist as he huddled over the table, intent on some task.

Heero's breath caught. Could it be?

The room was rather large for one man's solitary confinement. Rather large and rather plain with Robin's egg blue walls, gray carpet and a skylight.

"Do you recognize him?" Doctor Finch asked.

From this angle, the hair in the loose ponytail concealed the man's face. His hands were in continuous motion, sorting through black beads.

Quatre stepped forward cautiously. He was more frightened than he had been in battle. "I don't feel anything," he said, as he slowly approached the man. "It's as though no one is sitting there."

"He's a tough a case," the doctor said. "I haven't worked with him, but everyone knows about Zero Two."

Heero nearly growled in frustration as he pushed passed them. He went around and stood at the opposite side of the table and stared at the patient's face. The man didn't looked up, but Heero knew him the moment he laid eyes on him. His chest tightened like an iron fist had taken hold of his heart and was about to rip it from his body. Duo...

"Heero?" Quatre asked in a worried tone. "Is it...?"

Heero gave a small nod.

"It's Duo?" Quatre darted to Heero's side and looked at the patient. "Duo, it's you!"

Quatre stepped forward his arms out, but Doctor Finch shouted from across the room. "Please don't touch him!"

Quatre froze and looked wild-eyed at the doctor. "But, it's Duo! He'll know me."

The doctor and Trowa joined the others standing in front of the table. They stared at the patient, but the patient didn't acknowledge them.

"Does he know we're here?" Trowa asked.

"Yes, I believe so. I think we'd better wait for Doctor Gies to return."

Quatre knelt beside the table, looking into Duo's face. "Duo, it's Quatre. Don't you remember me? What have they done to you?"

"I don't think he knows you," the doctor said.

Quatre turned moist, bewildered eyes up at man. "But I'm his best friend. He's got to know me."

"The mind is a complicated machine. Perhaps if you visited him everyday, in time he would recognize you."

The former Gundam pilots stared at their friend seated at the table. He had not looked up once. It was as though they weren't even there. Duo's eyes were downcast, focused on his task, his slender, pale hands stringing a long cord with black, shiny beads.

"Zero Two, you have visitors," the doctor said, trying to engage the patient. Duo's hands just kept working.

"Don't you recognize us, Duo?" Quatre said, persistent in his attempt to reach his friend. "It's Quatre... and Trowa and Heero. We're here to see you. What's happened that you don't know us?"

"I suspect part of his condition is from post-traumatic syndrome," Doctor Finch said.

"What was his condition when he was brought here?" Trowa asked, his hand going to Quatre's shoulder.

"I've only been on staff two years, but I had heard there were violent episodes. I believe those have diminished due to a closely monitored daily physical regime, healthy diet, and chemical therapy."

"Chemical therapy? You mean drugs?" Quatre asked.

"Yes, Doctor Gies is ahead of his time in that regard. I would say your friend's current state of contentment is due to the chemical therapy. It allows him to enjoy this exercise-"

"That's enough," Heero said. His eyes had not moved from Duo. He could not comprehend that the young man sitting before him-placid-was the same spitfire he had known five years ago.

His skin looked far too pale, but Duo seemed physically well, which was probably due to the physical exercise he was given. His hair was tangled and loosely bound, but freshly washed, and he was wearing a clean white long sleeved t-shirt, gray sweat pants and slippers.

Quatre got up from the floor and asked the doctor more questions about the treatments used at the Institute. He listened to the doctor's excited explanations of innovative methods the Institute had pioneered.

"We appreciate all the Institute has done for Duo," Quatre said, staring at the blankness on his friend's face. He wanted to believe the Institute was making progress-albeit slowly.

"Thank you," Doctor Finch said.

"Would you mind if we sat with him for a while?" Trowa asked.

"I think it would be good for him," the doctor said. "I'll see if I can access his chart and we can talk more."

After Doctor Finch left the room, the friends stood around the table watching Duo. There was a drawn out silence as the situation sank in. They had found Duo, but he was not whole. Now what to do?

"He acts as though we're not even here," Quatre said, his heart sinking at Duo's unresponsive state. It was so unlike his formerly larger-than-life self.

"Has he really been here since the end of the war?" Trowa asked.

Quatre frowned. Now that they knew where Duo had been these intervening years it felt like they had let him down somehow. "I wish we had found him sooner, but they seem to have done a lot for him. It's been a good home for him."

"No, it hasn't," Heero said.

"I don't like seeing him here anymore than you, Heero, but what's the alternative? What is it you don't like?"

"Everything," Heero said with eyes blazing.

Quatre shook his head. "None of us expected to find him... like this."

Heero felt his skin going from warm to hot. He was trained to regulate his pulse and breathing, but right now he was losing control. "This is no place for him."

"Do you really think it's that bad?" Quatre asked. "Maybe we should be grateful for what they've-"

"He's a soldier, damn it!" Heero shouted. He wanted to crawl out of his skin, blast through the ceiling of this cell and get Duo the hell out of here. "Have you looked at him, Quatre? They've got him making fucking beaded necklaces!"

The former Wing pilot lunged forward, sweeping his arm across the table and knocking the beads onto the carpeted floor. Duo immediately clutched the half-made necklace to his chest, but did not respond in any other way.

Quatre moved quickly, shoving Heero back and away from the table. The friends stared at one another, a battle tension in the air.

"Stop it!" Trowa shouted.

By then, Doctor Finch and the security guard had returned. "I'm going to have to ask you to leave," the doctor said.

Ignoring them, Trowa glared at his companions. "At least he's alive."

"You call this living?" Heero asked.

Quatre's heart hammered. The intensity of emotion from Heero was almost enough to knock the breath from his lungs. Such strength of feeling was not new to Heero, but it was something Quatre had not sensed from him since the war.

"We can't turn against each other now," Quatre said, regaining his calm. "We have to agree on what's best for Duo, and I think that the doctors are making progress with him."

"Damn it, Quatre," Heero said, gritting his teeth.

"Why are you acting like this?" Quatre's heart was sputtering erratically trying to keep up with his friend's raging emotions. He dared to reach out and place his hand gently on Heero's forearm. "Tell me what's bothering you."

Heero looked into his friend's eyes. He saw Quatre's concern, but was this the time and the place to release the burden of his heart?

Quatre's clear eyes searched his, and in an instant realization brightened in them. "Oh, Heero..."

"Don't say it," Heero said, stepping away from his friend. "Don't you dare say it."

"What?" Trowa asked. "What's going on?"

Quatre glanced at his lover and then back at Heero. He didn't know what to do. They needed to talk. He needed to hear Heero admit his feelings, the feelings that Quatre could sense all too clearly now. Tormented, lonely feelings...

"I need you out of this room," Doctor Finch said, authoritatively.

With much reluctance, the former Gundam pilots went out into the hall, but would go no further. They had to come to a decision on how to handle Duo's rehabilitation. One thing was certain, they all wanted Duo's treatment re-assessed.

When the guard locked the door behind them, leaving Duo in that cell alone with his craft project, Heero wished like Hell he hadn't let them destroy his Gundam. He wanted to take this whole damn place out, blow it off the map.

"I think it'd be best if you came back another day. I can set up a meeting with Doctor Gies-"

"Unacceptable," Heero said, staring at the man.

"Your behavior has made it necessary," the doctor said, nodding to the security guard.

Heero watched the guard go around to his station and call for more guards. They were going to forcefully remove them from the facility! Well, two could play at that game.

He turned to his friends. "We're getting Duo out of here. Now."

"You don't have authorization to take that patient anywhere," Doctor Finch said. "Who do you people think you are?"

"We'll need his medical records," Heero said, ignoring the doctor's protestations.

"You're not getting anything."

Several guards came jogging down the corridor toward them.

Heero looked to Quatre. "He can't stay here, Quatre. Not one minute longer."

"Be reasonable, Heero. We don't know the details of his condition. We have nowhere to take him."

"We should wait for Doctor Gies to tell us more about Duo's treatment," Trowa said. "Then we can talk about transferring him to another facility."

Heero couldn't act reasonable in this moment. His emotions were overflowing and all he wanted was to take Duo in his arms and make it better, and he couldn't do that with Duo locked in that room. Maybe his friend's were right and they should wait to speak with Doctor Gies, but that wouldn't change how he felt about this place. Duo did not belong here, and he believed that the only way Duo was going to get better was to be away from these so-called pioneers of medicine.

"Look me in the eye," Heero said to Trowa, "and tell me you can turn your back and leave him here."

Trowa's brow furrowed. "We wouldn't be turning our backs on him!"

"Trowa..." Quatre said, trying to soothe his lover.

"No, Quatre, I've had enough of Heero's attitude." Trowa stepped towards Heero in a threatening posture. "Where do you get off acting like you're the only one who cares about Duo? As I recall, you barely tolerated him during the war."

"Trowa don't..." Quatre said.

"We all did things we regretted later," Heero said.

The look on Trowa's face turned from anger to confusion. "All right, so you regret being an ass to him, but that doesn't give you more say over what happens to him now."

"None of you have any say," a voice said from behind. They turned to see another doctor approaching. He was an older man with a trim gray beard. "I'm Doctor Gies," he said as he joined the group. "What is this commotion? When I returned just now, I was told that Preventers agents were here to see me, and heard calls for a security detail to be sent to this wing."

"They want to take Zero Two with them," Doctor Finch said. "They say he's a colleague of theirs."

"I'm responsible for all the patients at this facility," Doctor Gies said. "Zero Two is in no condition to be transferred."

"What condition is he in... exactly?" Heero asked.

"Unless you have legal guardianship over my patient, I am not at liberty at say."

Heero's back stiffened. They had found Duo! They needed to get him out of here and find out what these mad scientists had been doing to him all these years.

"The Preventers have been investigating Duo Maxwell's disappearance for five years," Heero said. "It would help our report if you could tell us about his condition."

"Maxwell? How can you be certain this is the man you're looking for?"

"We have positively identified him."

Doctor Gies raised an eyebrow. "Visual identification?"

"Yes." Heero showed Gies the photo of Duo. It had been found in an OZ databank some years ago and pictured Duo in his trademark priest's collar.

"Well, physically there is a resemblance, but unless you have DNA to support your claim you could be mistaken."

Heero stepped toward the doctor, but Quatre quickly moved between them, deflecting a potential confrontation. "It has been five years, since we saw Duo, but we knew him well. I'm sure we could get the necessary data to verify his identity."

"I admire what you're trying to do," Doctor Gies said. "There's nothing I would like better than to give Zero Two his life back, but you must understand my caution."

"Of course, doctor. We want what's best for Duo, too," Quatre said.

"You probably noticed that physically he is quite healthy, but his mental condition is fragile. Without this level of care, he would have gone mad, but as you've seen, he's quite content."

"He's vacant," Heero said. "Or is that how you like him? High on so many drugs that he can't think for himself."

"Heero!" Quatre said. "Doctor Gies has been given a difficult case..."

"Has he? I haven't heard what condition they're treating."

Gies stared hard at Heero. "I've heard the Preventers always get the job done, and I can see you are determined to do what's right. Perhaps you gentlemen can meet with me tomorrow to discuss my patient's possible identity."

"We know it's Duo," Quatre said.

"As I said, I'm responsible for him, and I'll need to verify the facts."

Something wasn't right here. Heero felt it in his bones; his warrior's instincts were raising the hair on the back of his neck. The doctor was trying to get rid of them. If they agreed to the meeting and left, they would not gain access to the facility again.

"As an agent of the Earth Sphere Unified Nations," Heero said, "I am taking custody of Duo Maxwell as a witness to war crimes."

"War crimes?" Quatre asked in shock. "Heero, what are you talking about?"

It was an idea that came to him in the moment. As a witness to OZ's mistreatment and possible torture of prisoners of war, Duo could be released into his custody and taken from this place. No questions asked.

"Young man," Doctor Gies said. "If you truly care about your colleague you would desist with this nonsense and allow us to get on with our work."

"Are you resisting the authority of the Preventers?" Heero asked.

"I'm resisting your ridiculous misuse of power. Now guards, please escort these gentlemen from the Institute."

The guards took a step forward, and Heero pulled his gun from his holster and pointed it at them.

"Heero!" Quatre shouted. "Don't do this."

"You're taking this too far," Trowa said.

His eyes didn't waver from the guards, though they were no threat. They carried only batons, mace and handcuffs.

"Do you really want to tarnish your career by kidnapping one of my patients?" Doctor Gies asked.

Heero gave a little snort. Nothing mattered, but getting Duo out of here. With one hand he grabbed the mobile phone clipped to his belt and pressed the automatic dial for Wufei. His friend answered on the third ring.

"Yuy here. We've located Duo at the Institute for Mental Illness."

"How is he?"

"Stable. I've taken him into my custody as a witness to war crimes."

"Why do I get the feeling you don't have authorization to do that? Have you talked to Une?"

"Negative."

"Damn it, Yuy."

"This isn't the time, Wufei."

There was a sigh on the other end of the line. "I suppose you need back-up."

"Affirmative."

"I can get agents there in five minutes."

"Thank you," Heero said, rather uncharacteristically for an official call. "Yuy out." He clipped the phone back on his belt, his gun now fixed on Doctor Gies. "Open the cell and prepare him to leave."

"You don't know what you're doing," Gies said. "He's on a strict regimen and if he goes off that schedule-"

"What doctor? What happens when he's not on your drugs?" Heero asked, gritting his teeth.

The doctor looked flummoxed, caught in some deception. He signaled for the guard to open the cell, and asked a nurse to bring a wheelchair and a sedative.

"You're making a terrible mistake," Gies said. "I don't know what you think you're accomplishing taking him from here. Make your inquiries, but leave him here where his condition is monitored at all times."

The guard and nurse went into the room with Doctor Gies. Heero, Trowa and Quatre stood in the doorway.

"Where are we going to take him?" Quatre asked, nervously. "Do you have another facility in mind?"

"He's coming home with us."

"Do you have any idea what it takes to look after an invalid?" Quatre asked.

Heero turned fierce eyes on Quatre, making the smaller man visibly shiver. "You are one of the richest men in the Earth Sphere. Are you telling me you don't have the resources to care for one of our own?"

"So that's your plan? Have Quatre look after him?" Trowa asked.

"I'm asking for your help," Heero said, his voice softening.

He glanced over to Duo and watched as the nurse hurriedly gave him a shot of sedative and stepped back. Duo turned towards her, his arm swinging towards her and he growled like a caged, angry animal.

"Quatre," Heero said, trying to control his emotions. "We can accomplish anything we set our minds to. We will do this for Duo."

"We?" Trowa asked. "Quatre and I will do what it takes, but what about you?"

"I don't intend on leaving Duo again."

The tone of Heero's words sounded unusually possessive. Trowa supposed his friend meant that he would do whatever it took to make Duo well again.

~ ~ ~

~ Flowing ~

In moments, Duo was moved into a wheelchair, an Afghan thrown over his legs. His head was slumped forward in his unconscious state. Doctor Gies fussed about abuse of governmental powers, and reluctantly made a list of drugs and their doses. At the last moment, he handed over a copy of Duo's chart.

Quatre wondered if this was the best way to help Duo. There was so much they didn't know, including what had happened to him. Was he even the same boy they once knew?

The Preventers agents arrived and escorted them from the building like dignitaries under guard. The former Gundam pilots got into their rental car with Heero driving, Trowa in the front passenger seat, and Quatre and Duo in the backseat. Quatre used his mobile to arrange for a physician to meet them at the shuttle port.

"I'm calling Iria," he said, after ending the first call. "I think Duo should go to her hospital."

Heero cringed. "I'd rather he didn't go to another medical facility."

"I understand," Quatre said, calmly. "It's only temporary. Iria will be better able to assess his condition there, meanwhile I can have a suite of rooms converted for his care."

Heero saw the logic, and knew that Quatre would never let him down. Even though Quatre and Trowa had grown more cautious, they were loyal, capable young men. They always did the right thing.

As he drove them back to the shuttle port, Heero tried not to glance too often in the rearview mirror. They had won the war, but could they bring Duo back from the unknown?

~ ~ ~

On L4, Doctor Iria Winner and an elite medical team was waiting when they landed. Heero stepped back as Duo's care was given over to Quatre's sister, and the specialists she had gathered. Quatre had made a dozen calls in-flight to ensure everything would be ready for their patient. Heero felt some regret for his earlier comments implying that Quatre and Trowa did not have Duo's best interests at heart. The truth was that he feared his own limitations and the restlessness of his emotions, and needed their combined strength and intercession to succeed.

He had imagined Duo's return many times, but never like this, never as a shell of his former self. It was disconcerting and maddening, and not the homecoming any of them had wanted.

They went along to the hospital, where Iria was chief of staff, but they quickly felt useless. Duo's chart was handed over, and he was taken away for a broad array of testing. They sat in a waiting room and after a couple of hours Iria came out to speak with them.

"His condition is stable. We're keeping him sedated while we're awaiting the test results."

"Is there anything in his chart to indicate what's wrong with him?" Quatre asked.

"Oddly, no, but I'll need to go over it more closely in the coming days."

"Were you able to get him a private room?" Quatre asked.

Iria chuckled. "Anything for you and your friends, little brother. My staff followed your instructions to the letter. Would you like to wait for Duo there? He'll still be sedated, but at least you can see his room."

"That would be great, thank you."

On the tenth floor, a nurse met them at the elevator and escorted them to the private suite of rooms set aside for Duo. The main room had a double-wide hospital bed near a bank of windows and a seating area with comfortable chairs and couches to allow for several visitors at a time. The room was already filled with flowers, courtesy of Quatre, and the standard bed coverings had been switched with the best designer cotton sheets and a handsome all-white summer quilt. It was impractical, but Quatre didn't care. He had hired private nurses to attend to his friend twenty-four hours a day, in addition to the medical staff his sister had assigned to Duo's case.

"I still can't believe we found him," Quatre said, taking a seat in one of the upholstered arm chairs.

"I'm sure your sister will give him the best care," Trowa said.

"And I appreciate all you're doing," Heero said. "I'll arrange my schedule so that I can be here as often as possible."

"You're not taking a leave of absence?" Trowa asked.

"I have to return to L2 in the morning, but I will see about a temporary transfer to L4."

Quatre smiled. "I'm sure Duo would want you by his side."

The comment gave Heero pause. He was not the anxious type, but tonight he was anxious about many things-what the final word on Duo's condition would be; how long it might take him to recover; and if they would find evidence that the Institute had mistreated Duo. Once those questions were answered, he could consider the biggest one of all-did he have any chance with Duo?

"We should have an extra bed brought in, so we can stay with him," Heero said.

"If you're worried about him being alone, a private nurse will always be here. I've made arrangements for sleep quarters in the adjacent room."

"I suppose I could sleep on the couch."

"When would you have time? You'll be working," Trowa said.

"I plan to be here as much as possible."

Trowa and Quatre exchanged a look, but did not comment. Just then, Doctor Winner arrived with her patient on a gurney. The friends watched as a sleeping Duo was carefully moved from the stretcher to the bed. He was wearing a hospital gown and his hair was pulled back into a ponytail.

Iria came over to speak with them once more. "I've scheduled more tests for the morning. I should have something definitive to tell you by tomorrow evening."

"That would be wonderful," Quatre said.

"Get some rest, and know that your friend is safe."

"Thank you," Quatre said, giving his sister a big hug. He and Trowa started to leave, but Heero remained seated. "Aren't you coming home with us? You can spend the night in our guestroom."

"No, thank you. I'm staying here."

"Heero, you heard my sister, Duo is safe."

"Yes, he's in good hands, but I prefer to stay here tonight."

Quatre searched his friend's face and remembered the emotions that had rolled off Heero at the Institute. It was foolish to argue, but he wished his friend would open up about those feelings.

~ ~ ~

After his friends had gone and the activity around Duo had calmed, Heero pulled up a chair to his bedside. Duo's bio data was monitored by a machine next to the bed, and an I.V. slowly dripped a sedative into his veins. Until they knew what they were dealing with, Doctor Winner wanted Duo asleep.

The artificial light from the hallway spilled into the room casting everything in deep shadows, and accentuating the shape of Duo's face. Heero studied that face, melding the matured features before him with memories from years ago. Physically, Duo was unharmed, even his pert nose looked unchanged, but the state of Duo's mind was still clouded.

Duo was receiving the best care in the Earth Sphere, but all Heero could think about was the repetitious movement of Duo's hands stringing those damn beads. Long, slender fingers had pushed aside some beads and took hold of others, and then slipped them onto the cord. It was an insult to the fierce young man Duo had been to give him that task, and a shock to see how far Duo had fallen.

"The God of Death," Heero said, quietly, recalling Duo's self-proclaimed title.

It was a powerful image. No doubt it had helped Duo do what he had needed to do, but was it powerful enough to make Duo whole again?

~ ~ ~

The next morning, Heero flew in his Preventers ship back to L2. Enroute, an unhappy Commander Une contacted him.

"Do you have any idea what a mess you've created? The political fallout from the forced removal of a patient from a private facility is monumental. Doctor Gies has some very powerful friends."

"He does?"

"Yes, Heero, and he's using those connections to put the screws on the Preventers. There's talk of legislation further limiting our authority."

"It was necessary to remove Duo immediately."

"I understand your concern, but I wish you would've contacted me. I could have found another way to get Duo out of there."

"And how long would that have taken?"

"Heero," she said, her gaze penetrating even on the monitor. "I am relieved that you've found Duo, and now that he's been positively identified, we no longer have to worry about Doctor Gies taking steps to retrieve him."

"He was trying to get Duo back?"

"Until yesterday, Gies was Duo's legal guardian. He had every right-"

"He was abusing him."

"You know that for a fact?"

"Doctor Winner's tests will back me up."

"If she finds evidence of mistreatment, I will personally lead an investigation against Gies. In the meantime, you are on probation."

"But I'm returning to the warehouse on L2 now."

"Agent Torre will be taking the lead on the disarmament of the MDs. You are on desk duty for the foreseeable future."

"Desk duty!"

"Yes, I want you to return to Headquarters as soon as possible."

"That would mean returning to Earth."

"That's right, Heero. I want you in Bremen where I can keep an eye on you."

"Commander Une, if I may make a request."

Une sighed. "Go on."

"I respectfully ask to be transferred to L4. Quatre, Trowa, Wufei and I-"

"I understand. You want to be there for Duo as he recovers. Wufei said as much to me yesterday. He's on probation, too, by the way."

Heero swallowed a grin. He knew Wufei would be angry at that black spot on his record, but it would be good for Duo to have his former colleagues with him.

"There's no use arguing with you or Wufei. You're good agents, and this thing with Gies will blow over... So, I'm granting your request for a temporary transfer to the Preventers office on L4. Chang, too."

"Thank you, Commander."

"Yes, well, consider it an investment in Duo's quick recovery. I'm sure with all of you there he will heal much faster."

Heero nodded, and the transmission from Bremen ended. He turned his ship around and headed to his desk job on L4.

~ ~ ~

The next evening, Doctor Winner met with Quatre, Trowa, Heero and Wufei in her office at the hospital. It was the first time the four friends had been together in months. Quatre spent several minutes trying to figure out just how long it had been, but they finally convinced him that no matter the length of time, it had been too long.

For the meeting, Iria brought her chair around from behind her desk and sat facing the young men. "First, I want to tell you that Duo is in good physical condition. Any injuries he sustained during his last battle are long since healed. His brain waves are strong, and we've begun the slow process of reducing his medications so that we can work with him in a more lucid state."

She reached to her desk and retrieved a clipboard with Duo's chart. "You mentioned something about Duo's transfer to the Institute and his name appearing on paperwork as Zero Two."

"Yes, that's what Doctor Finch told us," Quatre said.

"Well, no OZ paperwork was included in the file that Doctor Gies gave you."

"I'm not surprised," Heero said. "He was hiding something from us."

"I'm inclined to agree. Our initial tests of the drugs in Duo's bloodstream do not match those listed in his file."

"What?" Quatre asked.

"Doctor Gies gave you the wrong patient file," Iria said.

Quatre looked to Heero. "Why would he do that?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

"It's unethical," Doctor Winner said. "It would've been useful to have Duo's chart, but we can proceed without it. From what I've seen, the drugs they were giving him are designed to keep him in that semi-catatonic state. I tried to reach Doctor Gies today, but he hasn't returned my calls."

"Is there evidence that Duo was experimented on?" Heero asked.

"Not physically, so we'll have to wait for Duo to tell us. If he was tortured by OZ, he may not remember it at first, but we won't know his true state until he's weaned from the drugs and he can communicate with us."

"How long will that take?"

"It can take weeks for all traces of the drugs to leave his body, but I expect him to be fully lucid in 48 hours."

"Will he be violent?" Quatre asked. "Doctor Finch mentioned that Duo was violent when he came to the Institute."

"That's good to know and may account for the drug cocktail they're giving him. We'll watch for any signs of agitation."

"And if he's okay, will we be able to talk to him?" Quatre asked with a smile.

"Yes, of course, but he may not recognize you at first."

"I thought you said his brainwaves are strong and he's healthy," Trowa said.

"That's right, but if he suffered a great trauma, his mind may want to keep those memories and many more locked away. If that happens, it'll just take a little longer for him to recover. So, try not to be discouraged. I believe Duo is capable of a full recovery."

The prognosis was good, but it still shook the former Gundam pilots to hear about the potential complications of Duo's recovery.

When they left the doctor's office, Heero took Wufei aside. "We need to find out all we can about Doctor Gies."

"Agreed."

~ ~ ~

Two days later, Quatre phoned Heero at the Preventers office, his voice bubbling with emotion. "Duo's awake! He's calm and he remembers me, Heero. He actually remembers me."

"He knew your name?" Heero asked, skeptical.

"Oh, yes. When I came into the room he recognized me immediately. Iria was very pleased."

It was looking more and more like the drugs were meant to inhibit Duo's senses and self-awareness.

"I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Trowa's coming in just a bit. And don't forget to bring Wufei."

"Of course." Heero ended the call, and though his heart was beating faster he felt an unusual reticence. Doctor Winner had warned that Duo's state of mind would be fragile, and his memories would come gradually. The fact that he had remembered Quatre was a big relief, but might good memories bring the bad as well?

When Heero and Wufei arrived at the hospital directly from work, Quatre met them in the hall outside his room.

"How is he?" Heero asked. He wanted to see how Duo was doing for himself, but he suspected Quatre had a reason for detaining them in the hall.

"He's good. He just finished supper. Trowa's with him now, talking about the circus."

"Then his memory is good?" Wufei asked.

"He's a bit confused by everything. It's like he's been in a coma for five years, but my sister said to be patient. The fact that he recognized me is a very good sign."

Heero's heart pounded in his ears. He was about to look into Duo's eyes for the first time in over five years. He hadn't been this nervous in his entire life.

Quatre gestured with his hands to signal they proceed quietly, and led them into the room. The moment they stepped over the threshold, Duo and Trowa looked up, and Heero's breath caught. Duo was sitting up in bed wearing a hospital gown, and his hair was neatly braided. Duo looked straight at him, but there was no recognition in his eyes.

As Heero drew closer to the bed, he realized that Duo did not know him.

"Duo," Quatre said smiling, "You remember Heero and Wufei."

"I-I'm not sure," Duo said. His voice was quiet and lacked the confidence they all remembered. His large blue eyes looked between Heero and Wufei, eventually settling solidly on Wufei. "You're... Chang?"

"Yes, Chang Wufei." Wufei puffed his chest out like a proud peacock at being recognized. "My Gundam was Nataku, and we had the honor of fighting alongside you and your Gundam."

"On Earth, right?" Duo asked.

"Yes." Wufei did not elaborate after Quatre gave him a worried glance. Perhaps it would overwhelm him to bring up too many memories at once. He already seemed confused by the Preventers uniforms.

Duo had gone to outerspace with his Earth-tuned Gundam and quickly learned its inadequacies. After the fateful battle in which he was captured, the Gundam scientists upgraded the Gundams for space battle and the next phase of the war, but Deathscythe and its pilot were no more.

"Perhaps we should order some tea," Quatre said. "How does that sound?"

Duo glanced at Heero again, but his eyes quickly slid away. "Tea sounds good."

Quatre called for room service, and he and Wufei settled into chairs next to the bed. Quatre was obviously overjoyed to have Duo back, but Heero couldn't help a pang of jealousy at their renewed connection.

Trowa got up. "There's something I need to ask Heero," he said, and walked over to his friend. He put his hand on Heero's arm and directed him out of the room. In the corridor he spoke quietly. "Don't worry, he doesn't remember me either."

"But you were talking about the circus," Heero said.

"Just filling time, hoping it'll trigger something. He knew Quatre right away... like lost brothers. Quatre was thrilled."

Heero tried to hide his great disappointment. He never guessed that Duo wouldn't remember him, and that it would hurt like this. Over the intervening years he had done all he could to track down leads, and prepare himself for the day their search came to an end. There had always been a chance they would never find Duo or that they would discover he was dead, but Heero had kept moving forward. One foot in front of the other he had gone about his life, focused on his work, and hiding his heart away.

Their mission was accomplished. Duo was returned, but Heero couldn't share in the moment. Once again, he was on the outside looking in.

"I'm not surprised he doesn't remember me," Trowa was saying. "I hardly interacted with him. But you... your paths crossed several times."

"He probably doesn't want to remember me."

Trowa chuckled. "It can't have been that bad."

"No, you were right the first time. I was an ass."

"Well, here's your chance to make amends."

Heero nodded and watched Trowa head back into the room. He hesitated to follow, hesitated to throw himself back into the hurt, but Trowa poked his head into the hall and waved him in. Maybe Trowa was right. He needed to make amends. Needed to show Duo that he was a decent guy and that those memories he was blocking of him weren't all bad.

He pulled up a chair like the rest of them. Tea was served and they sat for over an hour talking about a lot of nothing. It was the most uncomfortable hour of his life. Worse than being strapped to that exam table, bleeding and feigning unconsciousness in the Alliance military medical building.

His mind returned to that moment years before... A hiss of static from one of the monitors had alerted him to Duo's presence. He had seen Duo's face on the monitor, and read his lips. Even without sound, Duo's sarcasm had come through.

"What a guy!" Duo had said. "You've been awake all this time without changing your pulse or breathing pattern. Impressive. I'd like to ask you some questions. And if you'd like, I'll help you get out of here."

The rescue was fast and furious, and Heero had repaid Duo's efforts by stealing parts from his Gundam. Duo had good reason not to remember him.

The returned Duo was quiet, and spoke somewhat timidly like he hadn't found his footing yet. Having him alive and interacting even in this small way was a gift none of the former pilots had dared to dream aloud. Their reunion was going as well as could be expected until a nurse arrived to check on Duo. His eyes locked on her the moment she appeared in the doorway, and his body tensed.

Heero watched Duo's reactions to the nurse, noting his increased heartbeat on the monitor and the dilation of his eyes. Obviously, Duo did not trust this woman or medical personnel in general.

When she approached his bedside, he became extremely agitated and asked what she wanted. The nurse was rather young, and politely explained that Doctor Winner had ordered a sedative to ensure a sound sleep that night.

"No," he said, firmly with an edge of fear. "I don't want you to touch me."

The former pilots glanced at each other in silent confirmation that they had witnessed the same thing. Quatre asked the nurse to step into the hall with him, and moments later he returned to explain to Duo that Iria would speak with him later about the sedative. Duo did not enlighten them with why he had reacted that way-he might not have known-but his friends understood he was remembering something that had happened.

Considering that Duo was now awake to interact with his new surroundings, of which he was not entirely comfortable, Heero suggested that one or more of them spend the night. Of course, Quatre volunteered, but he had been spending most of each day at the hospital.

"I'll stay," Heero said.

Duo looked at him wearily and then to Quatre. "I appreciate all you're doing for me, but I'll be fine."

"But your memories aren't all back," Quatre said. "You should have someone here that you know."

Quatre had just unwittingly maneuvered Heero out of the job, but he was not giving up yet.

"Wufei and I will stay until Duo falls asleep. How would that be?" Heero asked.

That solution was accepted by everyone, including Duo. So, the Gundam pilots turned Preventers took the first night watch over their newly conscious friend. While Heero ran down to the hospital cafeteria to get sandwiches and coffee, since he and Wufei had not eaten dinner, Wufei sat at Duo's bedside chatting. When he got back, Wufei was in the middle of expounding on the role of the Preventers, an organization that had not existed at the time of Duo's capture. Like Quatre had said, for all they knew Duo had been in a coma for five years and had absolutely no knowledge of recent events.

An hour later, Doctor Winner came to see Duo on her rounds. Duo was not anxious in the least, which probably had everything to do with the fact that she was Quatre's sister. After she explained how important sleep was to his continued health and that the sedative she was recommending was a low dose, he agreed to the injection. Before he fell asleep she told him that the I.V. would be removed in the morning. His test results were good and the mild dehydration and nutrient deficiencies he had been suffering from had been corrected.

Iria left and did not question the Preventers agents staying behind with their friend.

Wufei turned off the light over the bed, so as not to disturb their sleeping friend. "Doctor Winner will probably release him in a day or two."

"I got that impression, too."

"What did you make of his reaction to the nurse?"

"Simple anxiety? You and Quatre are the only people who are not strangers to him."

"Do you think he could be remembering something that happened to him?"

Heero nodded. "That crossed my mind, though Doctor Iria said there are no physical indications of mistreatment."

"But we know that OZ is capable of mistreating its prisoners. Then there's the unusual cocktail Gies was giving Duo." Wufei shook his head in disgust. "The last five years cannot have been easy for him."

"Hn."

"Well, let's head out," Wufei said. "We can stop in to see him at lunch tomorrow if you like."

"I'm staying the night."

"You are?"

"Yes."

Wufei gave him a long look, but said nothing more. That was one of the things he liked best about his friend. He knew when to argue and when to remain silent.

Instead of sitting at the bedside, Heero turned the sofa to face the bed and stretched out there. Duo did not know him and for that reason, Heero felt he should give the young man space. If he should wake to find the stranger, Heero Yuy, propped in a chair next to his bed, he might become as agitated as he had with the nurse. From this distance, Heero respected the awkwardness of the situation while satisfying his need to be near Duo and to watch over him.

~ Inviting ~

The next afternoon, Doctor Winner approved moving Duo to her brother's penthouse where a suite had been prepared especially for him. Quatre had read somewhere that green was a calming color, and so he had the draperies and bed covers changed to a lemon grass color, and the upholstered chairs recovered in a complementary sage green.

Duo no longer needed intensive tests, and his condition could be easily monitored by the medical team that accompanied him. Quatre had two rooms near Duo's suite converted into an office and a luxurious dormitory for the physicians and nurses.

A psychologist who specialized in post-traumatic syndrome was flown from Earth to join the team. The new doctor, Doctor Cappucine, met with Duo everyday to begin the long process of emotional healing.

Of all the former Gundam pilots, Duo was most comfortable with Quatre. Duo's memories were still locked away, but his recognition of Quatre and Wufei was a positive sign that he would regain the entirety of his memories one day. In the meantime, his interactions with others were awkward and somewhat lacking in emotion. Doctor Cappucine advised them that the anti-social behavior was one more indication that he had suffered a trauma.

Despite Duo treating Heero like the great unknown, Heero made a point of visiting each day. Some days he stayed for only a few minutes, while on others, especially the days when Duo was napping, he stayed for an hour or more. Today, Duo was seated in a high backed armchair near a window where the sun bathed him in warmth and light. He was dressed in blue jeans and a baggy orange sweatshirt and thick woolen socks.

"Mind if I join you?" Heero asked as he approached.

Duo barely glanced at him as he shrugged with indifference. Heero frowned. It was like this every time. Duo wouldn't look him in the eyes, and when he did, he wouldn't hold his gaze for more than a second. It confounded Heero that after so many days of hanging around that Duo would not begin to accept him-remember him.

Heero sat in the chair across from Duo. It was late afternoon, and Heero had taken off work early and come directly from the office still dressed in his Preventers uniform. Quatre was letting him and Wufei stay at the penthouse for as long as their tour of duty lasted on L4. It was generous and torturous at once.

"What are you reading?" Heero asked.

"History," Duo said, keeping his eyes on the digital data reader. "The history of the war and the last five years."

"I could tell you about it if you like."

Duo shook his head. "I like reading."

He could continue to annoy Duo with this awkward conversation, or he could simply sit here, silently watching his friend from underneath his bangs. Duo's health was much improved. His skin had a pink glow, and he had begun lifting weights and using a treadmill. These outward signs of improvement were encouraging, but the absence of Duo's former, exuberant personality was difficult to except and to understand.

The penthouse was a safe and comfortable place for Duo, but part of him still seemed locked away somewhere waiting to be found. While Quatre and Trowa, and the medical staff looked after Duo here, Heero and Wufei had spent the last week investigating Doctor Gies. Maybe the key to Duo's complete recovery lay in the hands of the man who had kept him captive in mind and body for the past five years.

"Do you remember when you first met Doctor Gies?" Heero asked. The question tumbled out of him before he had the sense not to ask it.

Duo's posture stiffened and his eyes darted up to Heero's. "No," he said and quickly re-focused on his data reader.

Of course, Duo wouldn't know. He was probably so heavily sedated he wouldn't remember being transferred from one facility to another.

"I'm trying to find out what he did to you."

Duo looked up again, his eyes sharp like glass. "Why can't you just leave it be?"

Heero blinked. Usually, Duo's tone was passive and damn near emotionless. This reaction, even though it wasn't a good one, excited him. It was the first true emotion he had roused in his friend. "If he hurt you, Duo, he needs to pay for it."

Duo got up from his chair and clutched the data reader to his chest, reminding Heero of the way he had held the beaded necklace. "I don't want you to do that."

"What?" Heero asked, looking up at him.

Duo turned and headed for the bed, tossing the data reader aside. Heero followed him, only to have Duo hold his hand out like a stop sign. "Get out," he said.

"I'm sorry if I upset you-"

"No, you're not." Duo stared at the bed, and not at Heero. It was crazy talking this way, but it seemed the only way Duo could speak to him. "You're selfish. You only think of yourself."

"Is that what you think?"

"Yes, now I'm asking you again... to leave."

He wanted to argue with Duo, anything to keep them talking, but he didn't want Duo to be right. He didn't want Duo believing he was a selfish man when he had spent so many years looking for him, hoping for his return. But right now, the only way to prove Duo wrong was to leave.

Heero went to the door, feeling like he'd been sucker punched to the gut. Before he crossed the threshold he looked back over his shoulder. He wanted to tell Duo that he knew he had treated him badly, indifferently years ago, but he would do anything for him now. Or was that confession selfish, too?

He left without a word, intent on finding the truth about Doctor Gies.

~ ~ ~

Ultimately, impatience and frustration prompted Heero and Wufei to continue their investigation of Gies. Commander Une had said she would authorize an investigation if evidence of Duo's torture was found. Well, that was a Catch 22. The only way to find the evidence was to investigate.

On their own, they rented a ship and flew to Earth. They took two days off so that they would not be missed. It was half past midnight when they arrived outside the Institute. They had traveled covertly, aware they could be booted out of the Preventers for good. But this operation had one chance of succeeding and that was to keep it under wraps. Their inquiries into Doctor Gies had revealed a disturbing, yet elusive trail back to OZ. Now they needed proof and the only way to secure it was to break into his office.

Dressed in black combat gear from head to toe, the two agents made their way stealthily across the Institute's campus to the building where Doctor Gies had his office. Over a week had passed since they had extracted Duo from this facility, and Gies had had plenty of time to cover his tracks, but Heero had a hunch that a man of his hubris wouldn't take those steps. The way he had squawked to his powerful, political allies, Gies had to believe he was untouchable.

As Heero bypassed the building's security and they made their way through the halls to the doctor's office, he couldn't help but grin. The bastard was going down for what he did to Duo. Sure the specifics of what he had done were still unclear, but both Heero and Wufei were certain they would discover a disturbing truth about Gies's so-called revolutionary programs at the Institute.

In less than three minutes they found exactly what they were looking for-the patient files for Zero Two. Wufei photographed each page with his miniature, high resolution camera while Heero checked the computer system for other records of note.

All too quickly a pattern appeared before his eyes. It seemed the John and Jane Does at the Institute were all OZ transfers. He downloaded the files for further review.

"I wonder if he's been continuing OZ's experiments," he said. His watch vibrated on his wrist. "Time check. Five minutes."

"Check. Ten more seconds and I'm done," Wufei said.

They removed the bypass on the facility's security cameras as they left, and took a different route out of the building to avoid the security patrols.

On their ship, they poured over the data, realizing with horror that their hunch was correct. Gies had been an Alliance military doctor before signing on to OZ's elite medical task force. That team of scientists had worked on a project known as the Emerald Eye.

So much of the puzzle was still missing that Heero wondered if they would ever find all the pieces, but one thing was clear. OZ had experimented on civilians and military prisoners of war, and Doctor Gies had been a party to those experiments, and possibly one of its developers.

They returned to L4 just before dawn. They had been gone nearly 48 hours and had taken precautions not to use any Preventers resources in the operation. The data would be sent to Commander Une anonymously via a complex network that would take weeks if not months for her to unravel. By then they hoped, Gies would be on his way to the Mars penitentiary.

Back at the penthouse, they shared their confidential findings with Trowa and Quatre.

"Then Duo was at the hospital on L2?" Quatre asked.

"Yes," Heero said, pulling the record up on the computer monitor. "Here is a copy of the OZ transfer. He was among the ones evacuated at the end of the war. Gies signed the transfer himself."

"But you didn't find anything about the Emerald Eye program?" Trowa asked.

"Only that it existed."

"Now that we have a name of a program, we can check recovered OZ databanks," Wufei said. "Maybe something will turn up."

"You may have just saved dozens of lives," Quatre said with a grateful smile. "But you took a big risk doing this on your own."

"When Une gets this data she'll assign a team to fully investigate," Heero said.

"He's hoping he'll be on the team," Wufei said and smiled.

"She would be foolish not to assign it to you," Quatre said.

As they got up from the table to leave, Quatre took Heero aside to speak with him privately. "I hope you don't mind my asking, but what did you talk about with Duo the last day you were here?"

Heero knew enough not to dance around the facts. "We never have much to say to each other, but I asked him about Gies."

"Well, that might explain why he was agitated after you left. And since then he's been waking each night from nightmares."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"Heero," Quatre said, placing his hand on Heero's chest. "You've grown cold since we brought Duo home. Has the reality of his condition changed how you feel?"

"I am as devoted to his recovery as I was a week ago... maybe more so."

"That's not what I meant."

"I can best serve this mission by keeping to the background. I intend on bringing Gies down and seeing that he's punished for what he did to Duo and others like him."

"I see. Well, that is a noble cause, but please don't forget the real Duo while you crusade to put his abuser behind bars." Quatre turned away and quickly left the room.

Heero sighed. Quatre wanted him to confess his feelings for Duo, but such a declaration was pointless. Duo was closed to him, guarded in his interactions, and preferring to be left alone. He had not even acknowledged that he knew Heero and barely tolerated his visits. As things stood now it was best for Heero to give Duo a wide berth. He would ensure that justice was done. He would travel the universe a million times if necessary, following broken leads and jeopardizing his own career for the chance that the result would open Duo's mind and let the healing flow from him.

~ ~ ~

As hoped, Commander Une assigned Heero to the Emerald Eye case. It allowed Heero to purge his feelings while hunting down war criminals, but made him appear a bigger ass to his friends, because he spent less time with them. Nearly everyday, Quatre left audio or text messages asking him to return, and updating him on Duo's condition. The nightmares had continued and intensified, but with them came memories he had suppressed. Wufei interviewed Duo to glean any details they could use in the investigation, but Duo shared very little other than access codes to his Gundam.

With or without Duo, they were accumulating pieces to the master puzzle that was the Emerald Eye. Several sources tied the elusive program to the Mobile Suit developers and their efforts to create pilots who could perform better. As yet, the investigators could only speculate on how they went about trying to achieve that goal.

After five weeks, the Preventers had enough evidence to connect Doctor Lucien Gies to the program. Agent Yuy led a team of several dozen agents, including Wufei Chang, to the Institute for Mental Illness to arrest the doctor and remove the remaining patients and files. To their great frustration word of the operation had leaked out, and the doctor had destroyed his files and gone into hiding.

It was only a temporary setback, but Heero took it as a failure. They had to regroup and begin again if they were going to catch this big fish. Meanwhile, it was time to stop running. He had to go back to L4 and see if he could build a friendship with Duo from the ground up.

Heero and Wufei returned to the penthouse with several days off to spend with their friends. Their probation had been revoked in light of the evidence against Doctor Gies and "time served," but that also meant they would be back on full duty and taken away from L4. This was Heero's last chance to spend any significant time with Duo. He would return to the service of the universe, and somehow find contentment in giving Duo his life back.

One of Quatre's assistants opened the penthouse's door, and directed them to the living room where Quatre and Trowa were relaxing.

"There you are," Quatre said, standing to greet them. "We had given up on seeing you this evening."

"You're going out?" Heero asked, noting their tuxedos.

"Yes, I hope you don't mind."

"When we learned you would be here for a few days," Trowa said. "We decided to plan an evening out."

"We have dinner reservations and tickets to the opera," Quatre said with a broad smile. "It's been ages since Tro and I had the chance..."

Heero nodded. He knew his friends had given up their normal routine to look after Duo and to be available for him. Did they think him a heel for staying away so long?

"Duo's been telling us to get out and enjoy ourselves," Trowa said.

"How is he?" Wufei asked.

"He's much improved," Quatre said, a bit cautiously. "His memories are returning, but they're a jumble and sometimes overwhelming."

"He's in the library reading Tolstoy's 'War and Peace'," Trowa said, barely concealing a roll of his eyes. "He's preoccupied by war."

"Doctor Cappucine says those are Duo's most prominent memories right now," Quatre said to clarify. "He has to process them just like we did after the war."

Trowa looked at his watch and made a face for Quatre to get moving. The blond darted out of the room to grab his coat, and Wufei headed to his guestroom to drop his bag before going to see Duo in the library.

Trowa took the opportunity to speak to Heero in private. "Duo's memories are coming back quickly. He remembers me now."

Heero nodded. "That's good."

"It was about a week ago. He started talking about New Edwards Base..."

That mission-a trap set by Treize Khushrenada-was not something any of them liked to discuss. However, it was the first time all five Gundam pilots had met, and Heero and Duo had partnered.

Quatre rushed back into the room. "Ready!" Just as he and Trowa began to leave, he leaned in to whisper in Heero's ear, "I'm glad you're back, and Duo will be, too."

If only that were true, Heero thought as a shiver raced across his skin.

After his friends left, Heero went to his guestroom and set his duffle on the floor. He took a long shower and thought about where he had gone wrong in the past. Eliminating the Alliance's pacifists at New Edwards Base was one of his many missteps. Treating Duo with indifference was another. He didn't want to make excuses, but he had been the product of an experiment that had trained the emotion out of him while making him the perfect weapon. It was almost ironic that Duo now treated Heero as emotionless as Heero had treated him years ago.

Whether it was penance or payback or none of the above, Heero would take it all if it meant Duo would forgive him, and remember him, and be his friend again.

Dressed in blue jeans, a favorite green long-sleeved t-shirt, and brown loafers, he headed out of his room to find Duo. As he passed the kitchen his stomach growled reminding him that he had not eaten since breakfast. He made a brief detour and checked the refrigerator for leftovers.

As usual, Quatre and Trowa had the best leftovers in the Earth Sphere. In addition to the refrigerator being fully stocked there was an Italian sub sandwich, asparagus wrapped with prosciutto, half a bottle of champagne, and a box of gourmet chocolates. He grabbed the sandwich and when he turned around Wufei was standing there holding out his hand. Heero grinned and gave him half the sandwich. They sat down on stools at the kitchen counter to eat, and Wufei informed him that Duo had gone to bed.

"Guess you'll have to wait until tomorrow to see him."

Heero took a bite of his sandwich and was silently thankful for the reprieve. Maybe he was a coward, but he wasn't anxious to have Duo give him that blank look again. It made him feel like an inanimate object.

"He was talking about his Deathscythe," Wufei said as he got up to grab something to drink. "And Howard. He had Quatre track Howard down and he's going to visit next week."

Suddenly, Heero didn't feel hungry anymore. He set his sandwich down and stared at Wufei. "Did he mention me?"

"No, but I did. I told him you were here for a few days, too."

"And?"

"And nothing. That's when he said he was going to bed."

Heero sighed. "That's probably not a bad idea. I could use the rest." He put away the remains of his dinner and said goodnight.

He watched the news on the television in his room and tried to fall asleep, but after nearly two hours he decided it was useless. He threw on his jeans and walked barefooted and bare-chested into the main living quarters of the penthouse. The house was quiet, and it would be several hours before Quatre and Trowa returned from their much deserved evening out.

After a moment's deliberation, Heero went to Duo's room to check on him. There was no longer any need for a full medical team, but there was a nurse on site. Her room was next to Duo's and the door was closed. Duo's door was closed, too, and Heero tapped on it lightly. There was no response and he was about to turn away when he felt that knot in his gut again. He was ashamed to admit it, but he still longed for Duo, longed for something they never had, and never would have.

He put his hand on the doorknob and turned. It was unlocked. The room was dark, but his eyes adjusted quickly as he stepped inside, closing the door softly behind him.

Duo was in bed, sleeping soundly. This was Heero's chance to be with him alone; to be in his presence without dealing with their new reality. He pulled a chair next to the bed and sat down. He would keep a silent vigil, telling himself that he should be satisfied to have found Duo alive.

He grinned at the memory of the searing pain in his arm that had been his introduction to Duo Maxwell. The other Gundam pilot had shot him and said, "It's pretty obvious that you're the bad guy here."

His hand went to his thigh and Heero almost laughed aloud recalling Duo's second shot. "Damn, but you were beautiful," he said in a whisper.

He hadn't realized it then, but it had been love at first sight.

He fell asleep, slumped forward with his head nestled on his arm on the bed. The sound of pained moans woke him nearly an hour later. He looked up, groggy, to find Duo struggling in his sleep. Was it another nightmare?

"Duo," he said, hoping to wake him.

He watched as Duo became more agitated, his body thrashing back and forth as if trying to break free from restraints.

"No, no," Duo said.

Heero leaned over the bed, grabbing Duo by his arms to still him. "Duo, wake up." When there was no reaction he knelt on the bed, squeezing Duo's arms hard and shaking him. "Wake up! You're having a bad dream."

Duo growled like he had that day at the Institute, and Heero knew that Duo's mind was replaying a terrible memory. After another hard shake, Duo woke, his eyes flying open as he gasped for air.

Heero stared at him, holding him against the mattress and talking quietly. "You're all right. It was only a dream."

Duo stared at him, wide-eyed and panting. "You're... here."

Heero nodded, unsure if his presence was good or bad.

At last Duo's breaths slowed and his body began to relax. Heero released his grip and began to slide off the bed.

Duo grabbed his wrists. "Stay," he said, pleading.

It was the first soft moment they had shared, and Heero had to clamp down on his emotions to answer. "I will. I'll sit right here."

"No," Duo said, shaking his head. He pulled Heero towards him, and Heero did not resist.

Their arms went around each other, and Heero felt Duo tremble. "It's all right," Heero said. "I'll stay as long as you need me."

They lay side by side with Duo holding onto Heero like a child who had been chased by a monster. In Duo's case, that monster had been Doctor Gies, but he needn't worry anymore. Heero would guarantee his safety and comfort.

He pulled the cover away from Duo. His skin was hot from the nightmare and he thought that cooling him down would help him drift back to sleep faster. Duo was wearing blue and white striped pajamas that had to be Quatre's idea. He had a hard time imagining Duo wearing anything other than briefs to bed. Well, he rather liked imagining him wearing nothing, but this was not the time for that.

In minutes, Duo was asleep again, and Heero relaxed with him in his arms. He felt guilty comforting Duo this way, but it hadn't been his idea, and he would never take advantage of the situation. Still, Duo might not feel this safe if he had access to Heero's thoughts.

Heero was nearly asleep when Duo turned to nestle deeper into his arms. He wriggled to find the best spot, rubbing his cheek on Heero's chest like a kitten settling into his nest. With one final adjustment, Heero felt it. He didn't want to believe it, thinking it his cursed imagination, but he scooted forward to investigate. Ah, yes, there it was. Duo was hard, and his erection was pressed against Heero's thigh.

Damn. Damn. Damn.

Heero's next thought was to leave, but that would be another betrayal of sorts. He would have to pretend it wasn't there. It was simply a sign of Duo's youth, of male vigor, and had absolutely nothing to do with Heero. He could be a body pillow and Duo would be hard against it.

He tried to retreat infinitesimally to put distance between them, but it was nearly impossible with Duo's arms around him. Duo moved again giving a distinct nudge to Heero's thigh, and then again, and again. Heero held his breath and didn't move a muscle, completely at a loss for what to do. Duo was humping his leg in his sleep!

A sweet moan escaped Duo's lips and he pulled Heero towards him.

"Duo..."

"Mmmm," Duo moaned and his lips found Heero's in the dark.

They kissed and Heero fell into the kiss as he had done in so many dreams of his own, but now he was hard. His body had been quick to respond, and his face was hot with what was certainly a brilliant blush.

"Duo, it's me... We can't," Heero said, pulling out of the kiss. Oh, but God, he wanted this. It felt so good and he had wanted Duo for so long, and now miraculously Duo was in his arms, rubbing against him and kissing him.

Duo couldn't possibly know what he was doing or to whom he was doing it. Heero had to take charge and rein them in. He pushed Duo back, but it seemed Duo was in the throes of a spectacular wet dream. In the bluish haze of near darkness, Heero could see Duo's face, beautiful in passion, his lips parted and his body arching deliciously towards him. In that moment, he decided to give Duo the release he needed. His body probably hadn't experienced this in years.

Heero reached down, his hand dipping inside Duo's pajama bottoms and coming into immediate contact with Duo's cock. He curled his hand around it, and Duo arched and moaned as his hard flesh was stroked. Duo wouldn't last long, and Heero wondered if he could maintain his own control. He quickened the strokes, feeling himself grow painfully hard as he touched Duo.

Duo's lips sought his again and they locked in a fierce, hungry kiss. It was everything Heero had dreamt it would be. He concentrated on the movement of his hand, but it was impossible not to think of everything at once-Duo's lips on his, Duo's hands in his hair, Duo's cock in his fist...

"Ahhhh!" Duo cried out as he came.

When Duo was spent and slumped against him, it took every ounce of self-control for Heero not grab his own cock and beat himself off next. He waited a full sixty seconds before pulling back.

"I'll get a towel."

He untangled himself from the sweaty embrace, and with wobbly legs he made his way to the bathroom. He was still hard, his cock making the front of his jeans painfully tight, but he had to deny himself.

After washing his hands in the bathroom sink, he returned to the bed with the towel. Duo took it from him and wiped his belly, but even in the dark Heero noticed that Duo wouldn't look at him.

"I... shouldn't have," Heero said, fumbling for words. This had to be wrong. This had to make things worse between them.

Duo turned his face away as he tossed the towel aside and pulled the bed cover up to his middle.

A tap at the door turned Heero's attention sharply to their visitor.

"Y-yes?" Duo asked, his voice sounding choked.

"It's Quatre. May I come in?"

Heero sighed and turned from the bed. How would he explain this?

"Yes," Duo said.

The door opened.

"Oh, am I interrupting?" Quatre asked.

There was a pause and then Duo said, "No."

Heero turned back to face Quatre. "He had another dream. He's fine now."

Quatre stood in the doorway, his eyes as wide as saucers, and the light from the hall silhouetting him. Heero was certain he could sense the awkward tension in the room. "I just wanted you to know that we're back."

"How was it?" Duo asked, sitting up.

"Wonderful!" Quatre said, now coming into the room. "Trowa took me to a new restaurant called Harmony and we had the most delicious seafood raviolis."

Heero glanced at the clock. "Isn't it early for the opera to be over?"

"Oh, it was delightful, but I was worried about leaving Duo... so we left after the third act." Quatre looked between them and the question was plain on his face. How he kept himself from asking if there was something between them was anyone's guess, but Heero was not about to wait.

"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself," he said and headed out of the room. At the door, Heero turned back to Duo. "Good night."

When he got back to his room he closed and locked the door behind him. Locking it was completely unnecessary for privacy's sake, but mentally he needed that extra barrier.

What the fuck had that been? How could he have let that happen? He had totally ruined any chance at friendship, taking advantage of Duo like some undersexed predator.

"Damn it," he said, kicking his duffle bag halfway across the room.

~ ~ ~

The next morning he was up and dressed by seven. He went into the kitchen for breakfast and found Quatre there, drinking freshly squeezed orange juice.

"Morning," Quatre said with a smile. "I'm heading to work."

"Will you be gone all day?"

Quatre shrugged as he took another sip of his juice. "Maybe only a few hours. I have to give my final approval on the architectural plans for the new space port."

"You work too hard."

"Look who's talking. Hey, feel free to make yourself breakfast. There are eggs and all sorts of things." He put his glass in the sink and gave a little wave of his hand. "I'll see you later."

Heero marveled that Quatre didn't mention the previous night. He had to be wondering what that was all about. Heero still didn't know, and felt more unsure than ever about how to act around Duo or if he should even go near him again.

Following Quatre's suggestion, Heero got some eggs and an English muffin from the refrigerator to make a fried egg sandwich. He had gotten good at frying eggs during the war. It was an easy campfire meal, and a treat if you happened across a farm with chickens. And it was fast. It only took a couple of minutes to fry the egg and toast bread over an open fire. He opted for the toaster today. With his sandwich plated and a glass of juice, he headed to the solarium to enjoy the greenery and to read the morning paper.

He had the sandwich half eaten by the time he got there. When he stepped into the garden room he froze. Duo was there, reading the paper. Heero was about to turn around and leave, but Duo noticed him.

"Morning," Duo said, tentatively.

Heero took a deep breath and headed to the table. "Morning."

There was an awkward silence, and then Duo held out the paper. "I'm finished if you'd like to see it."

Again, Heero debated about turning tail, but Duo's civility held him place. Maybe Duo understood that last night happened in the heat of the moment, a mistake best left unspoken and soon forgotten.

"Sure," he said, and took a seat opposite Duo. The newspaper was slid across to him. "Thanks."

Duo's eyes were downcast again, but Heero indulged in giving him a long look. The natural morning light from the windows above shimmered in Duo's hair like firelight. He'd never noticed it before, but Duo's dark brown, neatly braided hair had chestnut highlights, and a healthy shine. His time convalescing at Quatre's had done wonders, though he was not yet fully recovered.

There was an empty bowl in front of Duo which had probably contained cereal, and he had a half eaten plate of fresh fruit. He picked up his fork and cut into a slice of mango, and ate it though he seemed self-conscious. Perhaps he sensed that Heero was watching him, and so, Heero opened the paper with a loud rustle.

He scanned the headers on each column, looking for something that piqued his interest, but he couldn't get his mind off the young man sitting an arm's length away. He lowered the paper and peered over it. Duo looked up and their eyes connected, but again there was an awkward silence.

This was a bad idea. He should go for a jog or something, anything to get out of this house. He folded the newspaper and stood, the chair making a terrible screech across the tiled floor.

"Heero."

The sound of Duo saying his name froze Heero to that spot.

"I-I wanted to say... about last night." Duo was struggling to explain, and his eyes were downcast again.

"I owe you an apology," Heero said.

Duo's eyes came up fast, almost in a challenge, but they shown with confusion. "You're... apologizing?"

"I'm sorry for what happened."

Duo gave a small nod and looked back to the remains of his breakfast. He didn't say anything else, but he didn't have to, obviously it was not easy to talk about and was better put behind them.

Heero left the newspaper on the table and retreated from the solarium, heading straight for his room. He changed into his jogging clothes and was out of the penthouse in minutes. He ran for miles and spent the day as far away in mind and body as he could get.

When he returned just before supper, Trowa and Wufei were seated in the living room having a chat. They invited Heero to join them, but he made the excuse of needing to shower. After refreshing himself, he dressed in jeans and a blue pullover sweater and his loafers and came out of isolation to eat at the dining room table with the rest of them.

It was the first time all five former Gundam pilots had shared a meal... ever. Lucky for Heero, the others propelled the conversation along, seeming not to notice his reticence at being close to Duo. The meal consisted of a tasty rice casserole with Mediterranean spices and shellfish, flat bread and wine. They stayed at the table for nearly three hours before Duo excused himself for the night. His stamina seemed to be returning as slowly as his memories, and Quatre commented that just as soon as Iria approved they were bringing in a trainer to get Duo back into tip-top shape.

They all watched Duo leave the room, and when he was out of earshot, Quatre smiled brightly. "He was much more himself tonight, don't you think?"

Everyone agreed that they had seen glimpses of the old Duo tonight. That was a relief, but Heero knew the previous night was going to haunt him for years.

The friends toasted to Duo's progress and called it a night.

~ Undying ~

At midnight, Heero woke to a knock at his door. "Just a minute," he said, getting out of bed.

It was probably Wufei with news about the hunt for Gies, or Quatre fussing about something that had been said at dinner.

He slipped into his jeans and went to the door, opening it like a man who didn't want to be disturbed. To his surprise, it was not Wufei or Quatre or even Trowa standing at his door, but Duo.

"Is something wrong?" Heero asked, with one hand on the door and the other on the doorjamb.

Duo blinked and then nodded. "I need to talk to you."

That was unusually direct.

"Okay... I'll get my shirt."

"No," Duo said, causing Heero to stop mid-turn. "Can we talk here?"

"Sure." Heero opened the door wide and Duo walked into his room like a man on a mission. He hadn't seen Duo this forthright since the war.

Duo was disheveled like he'd been in bed and decided to storm down here to "talk." His hair was a little messy, and his jeans and t-shirt seemed thrown on in a hurry. He wasn't even wearing socks.

Heero wasn't sure why Duo was here, but damn, he looked sexy. "You okay?" he asked, closing the door behind him.

Duo nodded, but was looking around the room as if he was trying to find a place to perch. Heero gestured for Duo to take a seat which he did on the edge of the bed. Two seconds later he was standing again, and seeming altogether nervous.

"Heero," he said, facing him.

There, Duo had said his name again, and Heero's heart skipped a beat. "Yes?"

"I need to apologize... for last night."

"Why should you apologize?"

"Yeah, that's a good question," Duo said with a nervous laugh.

Damn, if that didn't sound like the old Duo. Heero nearly laughed with him, delighted by the change.

"I was aware... of quite a bit last night."

Heero stared at him, feeling awkward discussing this. "Yeah, I shouldn't have-"

"No, let me explain. You don't understand."

"Okay... I don't understand," Heero said. "So explain it to me."

Duo's brow furrowed. "I don't know how to tell you this-"

"Then just say it. Having you talking to me is..."

Duo's eyebrows shot up. "Is what?"

"It's refreshing."

"It is?" Duo asked with a tentative grin.

"Yes." Was it his imagination or were they having their first normal conversation? "Now tell me what's bothering you."

Duo took a deep breath, and a step back towards the bed. Heero knew body language and Duo's was telling him that he was uneasy. He moved towards Duo, and Duo took another step back, bumping into the bed and sitting down.

With large, worried eyes Duo gazed up. "Heero... I remember."

"You remember?" Heero wondered which terrible memory had surfaced in Duo's mind. Was it his last battle in Deathscythe? Or could it be the destruction of the Maxwell Church when he was a child?

"I should have told you," Duo said. "It was a couple weeks ago, but you've been gone, and things have been so uncomfortable between us, and my memories are still mixed up in my head-"

"Slow down. What are you trying to say?"

Duo laughed nervously again. "I'm trying to tell you that you're Heero Yuy. I remember you now."

Warmth rushed to Heero's face and through his veins, the warmth of recognition, of being someone... to Duo. Then as suddenly as elation struck, the reality of their past set in. "What do you remember about me?"

"Just stuff... It's kind of fuzzy and fragmented, but I remember I shot you twice!"

"You don't have to sound excited about it."

Duo chuckled. "And you stole parts from my Gundam."

"Wufei told you that."

"No, I remember it. We were on a ship with Howard... I saw you take off in your Gundam and was damn impressed with how fast you had fixed it, until I realized you had butchered mine to do it. That's what happened, right?"

"Hn."

"I'll take that as a 'yes'."

Duo was smiling, seeming pleased by the memories even though those moments showcased what a major ass Heero had been.

"Look, I want to apologize for how I treated you back then," Heero said. "It was my training." He shook his head. He swore he wouldn't make excuses. "I've been told I was an ass, and I'm inclined to believe it."

"Heero, I didn't come here to make you feel bad. That stuff happened a long time ago." Duo went quiet then, his attention going to the floor.

"Is it something you remember?"

Duo's shoulders slumped and he slid from the bed and onto his knees. "I'm so sorry," he said, kneeling at Heero's feet.

Heero stared, taken aback. "Should I get the nurse?"

"No!" he said, looking up sharply. "I just want to be with you... I've always wanted to be with you."

"W-what?"

"I know it's wrong, but that's how I felt then and how I feel now."

Heero's head spun. Surely his own desires were twisting Duo's words in his brain. "What are you saying?"

"Damn it, I used you last night!" Duo said, looking up at him with an emotion-filled face. "After you woke me from that nightmare it felt so good to be in your arms, I couldn't resist. I thought it was my only chance. And you responded... oh, God. But now you know the truth, so I won't blame you..."

Heero fell to his knees, overcome by the confession. "It's okay," he said, tentatively reaching out... hoping, hoping.

Duo collapsed into his arms, trembling, and Heero surrounded him in a warm embrace. He caressed Duo's long braid, and silently repeated the most unbelievably perfect phrase he had ever heard: I've always wanted to be with you. His heart pounded in his chest like it would pound right out of him it was so overcome with joy. He brushed the hair from Duo's eyes, looking into his face and seeing how painfully sad Duo was.

"I know this is late, five years too late," Heero said, his heart hammering in his ears. "But I've been in love with you since the day you shot me. And when you went missing a part of me died, but the war went on... We all went on and somehow I clung to the hope that you were out there somewhere and someday I'd get the chance to say these things to you. But I never really believed that you could feel the same..." He choked up, unable to say anymore.

Duo jumped back into his arms and kissed him-hard. "I love you," Duo said, the words mumbled in the kiss. "I love you, I love you."

They stayed like that, kneeling on the floor, embracing and kissing for minutes on end. It was a dream. It had to be a dream. Heero pulled back and looked around the room. Then Duo touched his face with his hand, returning his attention to him.

"You thinking this ain't real?"

"Yeah."

"Then stop it, because I've got some very real plans for you."

"You do?"

"Yeah, we finally admit we love each other. I'd say we've both been waiting a Hell of a long time for this." Duo nodded to the bed, and Heero needed no more encouragement.

He kissed Duo, telling him he loved him and swept him into his arms. He lifted Duo from the floor and laid him on the bed.

"Is that door locked?" Duo asked. "'Cause I don't want Quatre barging in like he has a habit of doing. Can you tell I haven't had much privacy lately?"

"Lately? You mean for the past five years?"

"Yeah, and I'm needing a Hell of a lot of privacy with you."

Heero strode to the door and locked it and when he came back to the bed, Duo was pulling his t-shirt over his head. He tossed the shirt to the floor and gave Heero a wicked grin.

"I've missed you, Duo."

Duo pulled Heero on top of him. Their lips and hands got busy loving each other and they quickly divested themselves of the remainder of their clothes. Throwing the covers back, they slipped under the sheets and melded the length of their naked bodies together. It was all so new, so electric, it felt like every piston was firing and every light was green.

Heero tried to pace himself, pace their lovemaking, but both of them were under pressure and ready to pop. He wanted to be reverent and gentle, but Duo kept egging him on to faster, greedier delights. They licked each other, sucked each other, and kissed each other silly, laughing and glorying in a dream come true.

Pools of joy drifted over them, possessing and caressing their minds and bodies. It was perfect and yet imperfect as they discovered each other's bodies, sometimes clumsily and sometimes gracefully as they made up for lost time.

At long last, Heero nestled between Duo's thighs, his fingers stroking inside him. His beautiful lover lay under him, his braid mussed and his back arched towards him.

"Just do me," Duo said. "I've needed you for too long."

He knew he wouldn't last once he was inside Duo, but Heero's need was too great for patience. He slicked himself and pressed his cock to Duo's ass. Their eyes met, Duo's bright, beautiful eyes looking at him at last... He slid inside, pushed and slid further.

"Yeah," Duo said with a heavy breath.

"You okay?"

"Shh... Come on."

He didn't need much encouragement, but it was sexy having Duo talk to him that way. How many times had he dreamed about this? But those dreams had never been this good. They could never replicate the emotion in Duo's eyes; the contours of his lithe, hard body; or the bounce of his speech pattern.

With another thrust, he slid all the way in and was lost to the blissful squeeze of Duo's warmth around him. He started to move, thrusting in and out in an easy rhythm, but his pace increased quickly. Duo wrapped his legs around Heero's thighs and wove his fingers into his hair, tousling it more than it had been from his sleep.

"Heero," Duo said, his voice husky.

"Duo... you feel amazing."

Duo grinned and kissed him. "You're amazing." And he shoved back into Heero, spiking arousal through them both.

They thrust towards each other, their pace in complete harmony, increasing speed and strength until they each were overcome by sensation and emotion. They came hard and fast, sucking the breath from each other in a final, all-consuming kiss that lasted a moment longer than their climaxes.

Spent, breathless, and gasping for air, Heero collapsed on Duo. They were hot, sweaty and sticky, but neither cared. They were delirious from great sex and the realization that each had been carrying a torch for the other.

Eventually they fell asleep after disentangling themselves, and wrapping themselves around each other in a new position.

Hours later, a sliver of sunlight came through the window to wake Heero. It was dawn and he hadn't moved a muscle all night. He gazed at his sleeping Duo and smiled. He had never been one for sappy prose or tears or smiling from ear to ear, but he saw the value in them now, and wanted to experience them all.

Duo shifted in his arms, possibly sensing he was awake. He didn't want to disturb the moment. He just wanted to feel Duo in his arms, feel his nakedness against him, and watch him sleep.

A light tap on the door snuffed that wish out in an instant. "Heero?"

It was Quatre.

"Mmm?" Duo moaned.

"Shh, Quatre's at the door. I'll get rid of him."

"Oh..." Duo said, and drifted back to sleep.

Heero wasn't sure that Duo had registered what he had said, but he removed himself from his lover's arms and got out of bed. He slipped on his jeans, the ones that had been hurriedly tossed to the floor last night, and ran his hands through his hair.

Another tap at the door. "Heero? Are you awake?"

He unlocked the door and cracked it open several inches, standing between Quatre and his line of vision to the bed.

"Good, you're awake."

"What is it?"

"Duo's not in his room. I've checked the entire house. Do you think we said something last night that upset him?"

"I'm sure he's fine."

"I've called my security team and they're searching the building. Where could he have gone? He's not well enough to be on his own."

The worry in Quatre's eyes hit Heero like a ton of guilty bricks. He and Duo hadn't discussed letting the others know about their feelings for each other, but he couldn't let Quatre tear the colony apart looking for him.

"Duo's with me."

"Huh?"

"We had a long chat last night and he... fell asleep here." Okay, so it wasn't exactly the truth.

Quatre stood on his tiptoes to peek over Heero's shoulder and gasped. Bingo. He'd seen Duo in bed. "Umm..."

Heero stepped forward and into the hall, closing the door behind him and forcing Quatre back.

"You mind telling me what really happened last night?" Quatre asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Duo and I slept together."

"You... slept together?"

"That's what I said."

Quatre's face turned from worried and inquisitive to downright peeved. "And you think that was a good idea?"

"Yes, I do."

"Oh, I see. So the fact that he's under medical supervision means nothing to you?"

"I didn't take advantage of him, Quatre. He came to me."

"Until he's cleared by my sister and Doctor Cappucine, he's in no condition to be making decisions like that."

"He seemed perfectly capable of making decisions last night."

Quatre sighed. "Could you wake him please? I'd like to speak with him."

Heero leaned closer to his friend. "Do you really need to do that now? He's safe, he didn't run away, in fact, he ran into my arms. Leave him be."

Quatre stared him down, hands on hips, and for a moment Heero believed that his friend was going to charge him and knock the door down, but suddenly Quatre's face softened and he smiled. "You really slept together? Like not sleeping, slept together?"

"Yeah, we did." Heero chuckled.

"Wow. So, how did that happen?"

"Turns out we've been in love with each other for a long time."

Quatre smiled brightly, and looked enormously relieved. "You realize this is the first time you've told me how you feel about Duo?"

"I guess it is."

"Heero, I'm so happy for you, for the both of you. I'll make us a special breakfast to celebrate!"

"Quatre, I don't know-"

"Don't be shy," Quatre said, putting his hand on Heero's forearm. "News like this has got to be shared."

"I was hoping to spend the day-"

"In bed? Well, how about if we make it a quick breakfast?"

Heero couldn't help, but laugh. "Okay, but give us an hour."

"Of course," Quatre said with a wink.

Heero went back into the bedroom, and crawled under the covers with Duo. He wrapped himself around him, nuzzling his neck and kissing his ear. Duo was warm, and smelled heavenly of musk and sex.

"Who was that?" Duo asked, sleepily.

"Quatre. You were missing in action."

"Oh, God!" Duo sat up like a bolt. "I didn't think about that."

"Don't worry. Everything's fine," Heero said, coaxing Duo back down on top of him.

"Yeah? He's okay?"

"I didn't want to tell him about us, but he wouldn't go away."

"So, we're an 'us' now?"

"If that's okay with you."

"More than okay." Duo hugged Heero, rubbing himself against his lover and then took his lips in a deep kiss. "What's next?"

"I was hoping to stay locked in here with you all day, but Quatre wants everyone to have breakfast together... to celebrate us."

"That sounds all right."

"Which part?"

"Both. Do we have time for...." Duo wriggled on Heero's lap making his intentions very clear.

"Absolutely."

Duo all but purred as he wrapped his arms around Heero's neck and kissed him hard. There were fewer preliminaries this morning before they got to the fucking. Oh, Heero felt with every fiber of his being that he was making love to Duo, but the way Duo rode him it was a fucking sort of lovemaking.

It continued in the shower with Duo's legs wrapped around Heero's waist and his back against the cold tiles for leverage. Something about lost years came to mind, but they did have a commitment to their friends and it probably would be good in the long run to let them in on their new relationship.

By the time they dressed and walked into the kitchen, hand-in-hand, the French toast was sizzling in the pan and their friends were all smiles and cheers.

"It's true," Trowa said, the disbelief resonating in his voice and on his face.

"Yep, here we are," Duo said, leaning over and planting a kiss on Heero's cheek.

"When did this happen?" Wufei asked, looking the most flummoxed.

"Oh, it's been percolating for years." Duo chuckled.

Heero smiled. Duo was himself again... mostly. It seemed the doctors were right. Once his memories started to return he would regain his confidence and begin to move forward.

"Sit down everyone," Quatre said, in a particularly sing-song tone. "Oh, Trowa can you get the champagne out of the fridge?"

The table was set with china, silverware and crystal champagne glasses. Trowa grabbed a new bottle of champagne and orange juice, and announced they'd be making a toast with mimosas.

They took their seats, Heero and Duo seated side by side.

Trowa poured the drinks, and once everyone had a glass, he raised his for a toast. "To Duo Maxwell, one Hell of a survivor, and to his and Heero's newfound love. May you be happy forever."

"To Duo and Heero!" Quatre said with cheer.

Everyone raised and touched their glasses to each other's, and then sipped their mimosas. The sweet ping of the crystal brought Heero's mind back to the night of Trowa's birthday. It seemed ages ago, but not quite two months had passed. Heero had been on the outside looking in, present in body, but not in mind. Melancholy had taken over his life and if not for his work and his friends he might've faded to nothing and never gotten to this moment.

Duo poked him in the ribs. "Something on your mind?"

"I was realizing how lucky I am."

"Yeah?" Duo smiled.

Heero nodded. "I don't think I'll ever get tired of these toasts."

The others smiled, and there seemed to be a general consensus that luck ran in all their veins.

That morning's breakfast was the best Heero had ever had. It was as though his taste buds and all his senses had been awakened. He savored each and every bite. The conversation was brilliant, too. No single person dominated, and everyone had memories and stories to share. Heero's favorite moment was when Duo recalled his daring rescue of Heero from the Alliance medical facility. It was like foreshadowing and they had come full circle. First, Duo had rescued him, and then he had rescued Duo.

"You should have seen him free falling from the 50th floor! He scared the Hell out of me!"

"I didn't think it was possible to scare Duo Maxwell," Heero said with a chuckle.

"Oh, it's possible, but you damn well better not do it again."

"I can live with that."

After breakfast, Duo used the vid phone in the kitchen to contact Doctor Cappucine to postpone their session until later that day. Heero stood around the corner, waiting for him, and couldn't help but overhear the conversation. He smiled when he heard the doctor's pleasure at Duo's breakthrough. As a reward for Duo's hard work, the doctor suggested they take the day off. Duo crowed with excitement, but then toned down his response as they briefly discussed the work ahead of them. The nightmares were persisting, but Duo bravely said he would endure them so long as it meant they kept bringing back more of his memories. Good, bad or indifferent.

Heero spent the remainder of his time off with Duo. They were always by each other's side. The closeness was like nothing he had ever experienced. It felt like he couldn't breathe if Duo wasn't sitting next to him or holding his hand. Duo's long absence was still fresh in his mind, warning Heero that Duo could still disappear into the universe never to be seen again.

Their time was cut short when Heero and Wufei received word from Commander Une that agents had tracked Doctor Gies off planet. They were to head out immediately.

He stood in the bedroom, dressed in his uniform, with his arms around Duo. He regretted this separation, but if it led to Gies's capture it would be worth it.

"I wish I was going with you," Duo said.

"One day you will."

Duo looked into his eyes and nodded. "This uniform suits you."

"Thanks." He kissed Duo's forehead and then took his face in his hands and kissed him fully on the lips. "I'll be back as soon as I can."

He couldn't remember a time when he hadn't been 100% focused on a mission. It took him several hours to shake the feeling that this interlude had been a dream.

The Preventers team spent the next six days chasing shadows across the universe until they were only one step behind, instead of three or five. Their latest information led them to a resource satellite orbiting L2. A man fitting Gies's description had taken a flight to this location.

Heero's fingers twitched as the Preventers ship married to the space dock. They met briefly with one of the dock's crew who verified that a small cruiser had docked there only hours before and the pilot looked like Gies. The cruiser hadn't submitted any flight plans, but it had remained on radar, heading towards MO-II. They didn't need coordinates to find one of the last staging grounds from the war-an exhausted resource satellite that Space Leos led by Treize Khushrenada had used against White Fang.

Less than an hour later, the Preventers found Gies's cruiser. It was floating in space, not having made it as far as MO-II.

"Cruiser Z103, this is Preventers XJ306. Do you copy?" Wufei asked over the inter-ship comm.

They stared at the space cruiser, dark and aimless in the vastness of space.

"She's dead," Heero said.

"Do you think he rendezvoused and abandoned it?" Wufei asked.

Heero stared out the window at the ship. Something wasn't right. Why would Gies abandon a fast ship like this unless he was going deep into space. Then he would need a freighter, but docking a cruiser to a freighter out here was madness.

"I'm going over," Heero said.

"Let's send a team."

Heero hesitated. He wanted to harm Gies in the worst way and for that he needed to be alone, but his conscience won out. "I'll take Baker."

After suiting up in the air lock, Heero checked that he was live with Wufei. He opened the air lock door to space, and he and Baker used propulsion jets to reach the cruiser. It took about twenty seconds to cross the distance between the two ships. Heero was focused on his goal, zeroing into the landing point, but a corner of his mind flashed on that feeling he used to get about wanting to float off into space, a feeling of nothingness he'd had after Duo was gone. The difference between then and now was beyond words. Duo was back, Duo was his, and Duo was waiting for his return.

He slammed into the side of the cruiser a little harder than expected, grabbing a handhold near an access door. Agent Baker was a second behind him. The cruiser was eerily still and Heero wondered how Gies had managed such an impeccable rendezvous in space.

When they entered the ship it was completely dark and sensors showed there was no atmosphere. He turned the light on his helmet to illuminate the interior of the ship. Dead didn't begin to describe this place. It was cold and unwelcoming. Their magnetized boots clanked on the metal floor as they walked toward the cockpit. Someone didn't want this ship being used again anytime soon-all the environmental controls were damaged and access panels torn out of the walls.

They forced the cockpit door open to find Gies floating there, blue from suffocation and the icy cold of space. His eyes were forever frozen in fear and shock.

"Gies is dead," Heero said.

"He's there?" Wufei asked.

"Someone got to him first." So, this thing, the Emerald Eye program was bigger than Gies. Could they really know how far its' tentacles reached?

Heero was damn pissed by the time he and Baker, and the corpse, got back to the Preventers ship. Wufei had called for a tow and set a Preventers enforced boundary with beacons around the vessel. They might find something of use buried in the computer's database.

Heero met Wufei in the hall outside the air lock.

"You were cheated of your revenge," Wufei said.

He looked sharply at his comrade. "You knew I was planning-"

"I had faith that you'd come to your senses before you got around to killing him."

"What I really wanted was to interrogate the bastard and put him in prison... for life."

"Has Duo talked about what Gies did to him?"

"He doesn't remember Gies, just pain... endless, racking pain."

"What did they do to him?"

"My guess is that Duo was a guinea pig for whatever they had planned. When the war ended they filled him with drugs and tucked him away to be used another time."

Wufei shook his head. "You think they were waiting to start the program again?"

"Finish it, more likely."

"It's difficult to imagine such a program existed without word of it leaking out."

"Well, it's leaked out now," Heero said. "Let's get this ship moving. We have a lot of paperwork before we can get back to L4."

Three days later, Heero returned to Duo's side. He was a man on a mission, but this mission had nothing to do with the Preventers.

"I want you to live with me," he said as they talked in Duo's guest suite.

"But you don't have a place of your own."

"We'll make a place together. Wherever you want."

Duo laughed. "Sometimes I can't believe it's true."

"Believe what?"

"That I'm here with you, that my mind isn't mush, that you love me." Tears filled Duo's eyes. "I must sound like a sap."

Heero grinned. "I like the way you sound... sap or not. Now listen, Quatre is not going to be happy about this. He's enjoyed looking after you, and he thinks I focus too much on work."

"Do you?"

"Yes, but that's going to change, because I've got you to focus on now. I'm going to take a vacation for starters."

"When's the last one you took?"

"I haven't. I've got years of vacation accrued. What do you say we start with a month and see where that takes us?"

Duo's face lighted with a brilliant smile and he wrapped his arms around Heero's neck, drawing him into an enthusiastic kiss. "Where should we go?"

"Anywhere, I don't care."

"Wow. Okay... let's think about this. Maybe we could stop on L2, so I can see Hilde."

"Hilde Schbeiker?"

"Yeah, Trowa said she's running a salvage yard there. I'd love to see it. Then we could go to Earth. I totally want to do something fun on Earth."

"I have enough vacation time, but I don't have unlimited funds."

"I have unlimited funds," Quatre said. They turned to see Quatre standing in the doorway. "Sorry to eaves drop, but maybe I can contribute something to your trip."

"But you've done so much already," Duo said.

"Duo, you have no idea how empty the world was without you." Quatre's eyes shimmered with tears and he laughed to stop himself from crying. "To see you and Heero together, it's too perfect for words. So, please, let me do this. It would be the icing on the cake of having you back in our lives."

Damn, but Quatre was good at speeches. Heero watched as Duo gave Quatre a big hug, and they started chattering about beach resorts and ski lodges, and Winner properties where they could stay for an extended amount of time.

That evening after dinner, Heero and Duo stepped onto the penthouse balcony to stargaze and dream about their future. Except that Heero couldn't take his eyes from Duo, from his extraordinary beauty and the strength that radiated from within him. He had suffered years of abuse at the hands of OZ and was still able to smile just like his old self. His young life had been difficult as well, and even during difficult missions in the war, Duo had been cheerful.

"Heero..."

"Hn?"

"I know you went looking for Gies to get revenge."

"...."

"I'm glad it turned out the way it did."

"He got off easy."

"Did he?" Duo glanced at him, and then back at the night sky. "It's fitting that he was snuffed out like that... alone... in space."

At first Heero thought that Duo had lost the fire of his youth, and the meaning of his existence years ago as the God of Death-the avenger of the Maxwell Church Massacre. Then Heero recognized that Duo's fire was still there just more controlled. Somehow he had grown up in the intervening years, and turned a living Hell into an opportunity to be stronger, deeper, and a whole lot tougher to break.

"You're the most resilient person I know," Heero said.

Duo chuckled, his eyes still fixed on the twinkling stars. "That's not much of a pick-up line."

"I guess not, but I thought we were already together."

"Yeah," Duo said, turning his eyes to him and smiling. "Yeah, we're together."

Heero smiled back, and took Duo's chin in his hand and searched his eyes. Even at night, by the city lights, Heero could see the depth of color in Duo's eyes-cobalt blue one moment and orchid the next.

"I can see the future in your eyes."

"Now, that's a pick-up line," Duo said, chuckling.

The space between them disappeared, and their lips came together in a long, slow kiss. Duo's hands slid up Heero's arms to his neck and finally settled in his hair. Duo loved to play with his hair and that was fine by Heero. He did things Heero never had imagined, things that were purely Duo that made his body, mind and heart sing. Like this kiss-the way he wrapped his tongue around his.

Duo's laughter was sweeter than the ping of crystal glasses. He was like a million suns, a beacon calling to Heero for five years. Calling him on and on across the universe. Find me, come to me, let me take you in my arms and surround you and never let you go.

"I love you," Heero said, pulling Duo into his arms. "I'm going to hang onto you with both hands."

~ the end ~