[catholic schoolboys rule!] Title: Catholic Schoolboys Rule!
Author:
Link Worshiper
Pairings: 1=2, 3=4, mentions of others
Stuff: AU, pokes at religious institution, fluff/sap, angst, lemon topping and a bit of drag XD
Disclaimer: Gundam Wing belongs to Sunrise, Bandai and a lot of other people who aren't me. +5 skill points if you guess the title reference.

Filling a request for Rainya, because she feeds my geek needs. This part isn't beta read, mostly because no one is awake and I want to feel like I accomplished something today. I hope it's okay.

++++

"Yes, we built a test module of it to experiment with the design," Odin was saying to Father Maxwell over a fine breakfast of ham and eggs the next morning. They sat with Doctor Jay and Mother Superior at a table in the headmistress's private quarters with the polite tinkle of silverware and glass clinking beneath their conversation. Odin elaborated: "We haven't been able to do much with it since the boy came here, though - he's the only one small enough to fit into the cockpit."

"We've also had to since redraw the blueprints," Jay added gruffly, cutting through his food with a grisly knife attachment in place of the claw that usually compensated for his missing hand. Both Odin and Jay seemed noticeably soured by that prospect.

Father Maxwell didn't seem to notice, or perhaps just chose to ignore it - though in all likelihood, he probably just didn't care - and instead carried on with the discussion blithely. "Ah, so Heero helps you with your work?" he asked.

Jay's knife screeched against his plate. "He has uses, yes," he said, spearing a piece of ham with his fork. He held the piece in front of his mouth and added, "But he'll never become much more," before yanking it savagely between his teeth.

"My father doesn't think Heero takes it seriously enough," Odin clarified for the other two as he took a genial sip of orange juice, afterwards dabbing his lips with the napkin folded on his lap.

"Damn straight, he doesn't," Jay growled, clearly forgetting the sort of company he was sharing. "He thinks he can toy with the project's development and come traipsing down here like it's some sort of game. I haven't got the time for some boy to botch my life's work because he just wants to fuck around." He looked like he wanted to say more, but his shortness of breath left him wheezing instead.

"Father, please," Odin hissed, eying Father Maxwell and Mother Superior from the corners of his eyes. "You're embarrassing."

Maxwell coughed conspicuously, ending the would-be quarrel between father and son. Back straight as he cut his food into neat squares, he commented, "Well, I had the fortune of meeting Heero the last time I was here. He seemed like a fine lad."

"He's a very diligent student," Mother Superior piped up. "Not one for any kind of distraction whatsoever."

"Lies," Jay spat curtly. "He's a conniving, deceptive little scoundrel - just like the bitch of a woman who brought him screaming into the world."

Maxwell and Mother Superior arched their eyebrows in shock at the abrupt description of Heero, but otherwise kept their personal opinions silent. Odin looked like he might have had something to say if not for the expression of agreement he wore on his face. The four fell into a rather awkward silence as they all focused on the plates in front of them until a thought came to Father Maxwell.

"Well, I suppose I really shouldn't be all that surprised," he said, quickly garnering the attention of the other three. "After all, I hear he's become friends with my debauching younger son."

"You see? Fucking around," Jay added as if Maxwell's comment proved his point about Heero.

"I hate to say it, but it is a problem," Mother Superior interjected gravely. "If you already have doubts about Heero, Duo will only lead him further astray. God help him." She put down her knife and the biscuit she was slathering in jam to cross herself a few times. "That boy is almost beyond saving."

"Well, I don't really care much who he's spending time with," Jay scoffed, dropping his fork and leaning back in his chair to pull at his beard. "Just as long as he doesn't start getting any wise ideas - he's in enough trouble as it is."

Maxwell seemed morbidly curious and leaned in a bit. "Trouble, you say? What could he have possibly have done that would concern you more than him being at the mercy of my queer son?"

Mother Superior whispered an oath and crossed herself again.

As if they were having some kind of silent communication with one another, Jay and Odin exchanged a brief look through which some kind of understanding passed between them. Being the more diplomatic of the two, Odin spoke for them. "This rebellious phase of his has gone out of check for too long. We're not going to tolerate this kind of disloyalty and disrespect any longer," he explained briefly. "We're here to collect him and set him back into his place."

"Little con artist won't fool us again!" Jay interjected with a burst of uncontrolled agitation. His words sunk into a low grumble that hardly disguised his contempt. "Thinks he's so damn clever. Should have realized what he was up to...."

With a small yelp of surprise, Mother Superior covered her mouth daintily with one hand, her eyes wide with the realization. "I had no idea he was here without your permission!" she said in an extremely apologetic tone. "There was nothing out of the ordinary regarding his application for the exchange program...."

"I told you he was conniving," spat Jay pitilessly.

Mother Superior was hardly listening though, her mind already reeling with the potential repercussions there could be if this breach in efficiency ever got out. "Mercy, we'll have to get this straightened out as soon as possible, gentlemen. Forgive me for simply assuming you just needed him home for some kind of family emergency," she said, already rising to her feet with a feverish air that didn't seem fitting for a woman of her age. She beckoned them to follow as she started to move immediately for the door. "This way - we'll go to the office and talk things over with the dean of students. By then, everyone should have gathered for morning prayer."

Noin was in for it.

++++

Meanwhile, in the hallway just outside of the room that Heero, Quatre and Wufei shared, Duo was lingering as casually as possible while he waited for Heero to come out and walk to chapel with him. He'd already seen Wufei go by, and each subsequent glance at his watch since then had the longhaired boxer growing more and more concerned: Heero was usually obsessively prompt. But when the door opened again, and Duo perked up with frenetic hopefulness, he was disappointed to find Quatre coming out by himself.

Nearly scaring Quatre out of his skin as he reached out to grab the passing blonde, Duo said urgently, "Where's Heero?"

Once Quatre caught his breath again, a slow smirk rolled across his face as he answered smugly: "Who wants to know?"

"Dammit, man!" Duo had the urge to shake Quatre with frustration, but couldn't be bothered to take the time. He dropped Quatre's arm and stomped down the hall to the door, knocking fiercely on the wooden surface and pointedly ignoring the way Quatre was grinning at him. "Heero?" Duo called. "Heero, we're going to be late."

A muffled cough wafted from inside the room in response. Duo took that as his cue to try the door, which he found unlocked.

Inside, he found Heero still in bed, propped up against his pillows as he covered his mouth to shield another cough. His eyes were watery, but he still managed a weak nod of welcome in Duo's direction when he saw him enter the room.

"Man, you look like crap," Duo announced rather obviously as he approached Heero's bed, making himself comfortable on the edge. "Who'd have thought that a little flu could keep down the mighty Heero Yuy?"

Heero coughed again before saying toughly, "Normally, it wouldn't. But who am I to ignore opportunity when it comes knocking?" He smiled a little as his intention sunk in on Duo.

"Damn, Heero, you're turning into a regular bad boy," Duo joked, though there was a glimmer in his expression that bordered on lusty. "You've been spending too much time with me, I think. What the hell am I going to do with you, huh?"

For a brief second, Heero's smile flashed into a dark smirk. It was so fast, Duo was sure he'd imagined it until Heero said, "You're the one who invited yourself into my bed."

Duo blinked in surprise at Heero, who wasn't making any effort to hide that smirk, now. Then he felt a tingling deep in his stomach that rose to his throat and fell past his lips to the sound of uproarious laughter. He couldn't chase the smile off his face even after the laughter subsided, replying, "You're the one who's letting me stay."

Heero's expression suddenly became grave as he shrank back into his pillows, but he didn't try and avoid Duo's eyes like he might have once done. He was looking at Duo contemplatively, as if he was unsure if he should say the things that were on his mind.

But Duo was hardly oblivious to the tiny fluctuations of Heero's features, and he made brought it to light: "Are you thinking right now?" he asked.

Heero had been so trapped inside his own head, he jumped at the unexpected sound of Duo's voice before nodding slowly. His fingers were toying nervously with the hem of his sheets, twisted them neurotically around his fingers, even as his unwavering eyes never left Duo. Clamping the blankets down against the mattress so they were taut across his lap, he said quietly, "I don't mind, as long as you're here."

An electrified current suddenly flowed through Duo, and he suddenly found himself afraid to blink, because he feared that the moment would be stolen away in so simple an instant. All his tortured thoughts seemed to vanish behind a cloud, overcome by the sensation that he'd never be lost again because he could see everything he'd ever wanted in Heero's eyes. If being this in touch with Heero brought light like this, he only wondered how long it would be until he too could fly.

Heero started speaking again, and Duo's ears rang like they'd only just been gifted sound for the first time. "You could be my friend - different from the rest. It's like I can't help what I confide in you," he said, halting almost unnaturally between his sentences as he thought of the best wording. "No one else ever looks at the sky like that - like you do, that is." He reached up to push a thick lock of hair behind his ear, scratching the side of his head as he did so. "I thought I was the only one who ever looked up and... and wanted more from it - knew there was more."

For the first time in a long while, Duo had nothing to interject with - no two-cent opinion of his own to share. Instead, he waited on baited breath for Heero to continue, wondering what Heero wanted to make of this moment. The answer came sooner than he anticipated.

"Who needs all this anyway? When I go, you should come, too - come with me to L3!" Heero suddenly said, gesturing to the drab room they sat in. "You want to go - I can tell," he went on with a bittersweet smile as he dropped his gaze again. "I used to look at the stars the same way - amazed how space always began in wonder and always ends the same way."

"Heero, I...." Duo suddenly felt like the scrap of reality he existed upon had been torn asunder, threatening to send him tumbling into oblivion with the slightest breath. Desperately, he grasped the foot of the bed as if it were some sort of anchor. "You make it sound so easy but... but it's not." He also hung his head, for the first time, shy to look at Heero.

The bed dipped as Heero shifted, surprising Duo when he was suddenly sitting beside him, two strong hands gripping his shoulders tightly. "It's time to wake up, Duo," he said sternly, feeling a strange sense of command overtake him. "It's too late for some, but you don't have to be one of them. Let your soul be alive." He leaned in a little, searching Duo's face curiously: "Isn't that what you keep telling me?"

There was a stirring within Duo's breast that was pushed by the same cosmic force that made the stars drift endlessly through the universe and whispered thoughts into the beings of every living thing. He lifted his chin and found Heero's unwavering blue eyes, which seemed just as vibrant with that same thing that was pulsing deep inside him. Overcome by clarity, Duo whispered, "But it already is. Too much, maybe." Heero's skin was smooth beneath his thumb as he cupped Heero's face, loving the way Heero's eyelashes feathered across his cheekbone when he glanced downwards.

There was a jolt between them as that vibrant strength coming out in Heero again. "Then what's holding you down?" he asked resolutely, his very words seeming to crackle the very air.

Duo wished he knew the immediate answer to that, but when he tried to speak, he found he no longer knew how. All he could do instead was shake his head helplessly at Heero as he chewed his bottom lip, pained that he couldn't express this thing trapped inside him to the one person he wished he could.

There was hardly time to draw much more out of the poignancy of that particular moment, because a loud pounding on the door soon shattered it. Both Heero and Duo stiffened, overcome with a new kind of fear - one that was much more tangible and hideous than the one that had been lingering mere instances before. The racket continued, punctuated by a stern voice from the hallway that made Duo's spine prickle and Heero's skin turn a ghostly white.

"Boy! The game is over, and you've lost it. Open up," came Jay's unsympathetic command. There was the sound of a slight scuffle outside, and then the rattle of the old doorknob as it started to turn. Duo suddenly cursed forgetting to check if he'd locked it when he'd come in.

Beside him, Heero was showing hints of a side that he usually kept firmly under wraps beneath his typically cool demeanor. Though his eyes were still calculating, there was a quiver to his shoulders that suggested a mounting sense of urgency and unrest as the door started to creak inwards.

"Boy!" came that sickening voice again, and Duo narrowed his eyes as the door swung completely open to reveal the speaker and his two companions. The very sight of him made him crinkle his brow in disgust, and he felt the pulse of rage begin to well within him: an anger so sharp and pointed - jagged like one he'd never felt in his life! Even his own father hadn't been the victim of such hate.

Behind Duo, Heero had shrunk into the corner, his hands gripping the sheets tightly as he stared across the room at his grandfather, the gears of his mind twisting fervently with nerve-wracked calculation. "What are you doing here?" he belted out with a slight hiccup.

Jay hardly looked amused by the question and merely frowned, leaving Mother Superior to speak up with the insult of someone whose toes had been stepped on hard: "You should know why very well, young man, considering the weight of what you've done. Do you know how much trouble you're in?"

Heero's brow stiffened as he grit out, "I've done nothing wrong."

"Shut up and stop being such a brat," Odin snapped from behind Jay, his tone ridden with annoyance.

As this was taking place, a squall had begun to stir in the black of Duo's eyes, a displeased crinkle compressing his brow with anger until he was unable to keep his silence any longer. "What kind of people are you to take such pleasure in breaking the will of a child you're supposed to care about?" he cried, leaping to his feet like an angel to arms. "It takes love to raise a child, not fear, you assholes."

Obviously not expecting to come across such confrontation, Odin shoved his way into the room, his mouth twisted with a different kind of anger. "Who the hell are you?" he demanded.

"Duo," Heero whispered cautiously, though the sound of his warning was drowned out by Mother Superior announcing to Odin disdainfully: "That would be Maxwell's boy."

"Don't associate me with that bastard," Duo snapped, singling Mother Superior out with a rigid index finger. "My momma's gone and my dad hardly wants to be, so I don't see why I gotta define myself by him anyway. Just like how Heero don't gotta keep these jerks around, crushing him, stealing his prayers -"

Three heavy footsteps echoed across the floor before the snap of Jay's palm striking Duo's cheek resonated loudly, lingering in the air like a breath being slowly exhaled. "That is exactly the kind of insolence that should be squeezed out of ungrateful rodents like you," Jay said with a sort of fascist command. With his metallic claw, he reached out and grabbed Duo's chin, jerking the longhaired boxer's face around so he could judge it. "I know your type," Jay sneered, pressing the steel appendages savagely into Duo's cheeks; "You throw your fist in the air and talk big, but in the end, you're still too scared to ever follow through. You think you see everything so well, so clear - but you don't even know what you want, or what's even good for you."

Duo gave his head a sharp jerk, freeing himself from Jay's cold grip, his fists clenching his building rage tightly at his sides. "You should really take those goddamn tinted glasses off while you're inside," Duo said with equal contempt as he grit his teeth, his shoulders tense. "All that darkness could make a person blind." Then, without warning, his rigid arm sprung, and his fist slammed heavily into the side of Jay's head, knocking the old man asunder.

All at once, a chain of things happened with such rapidity, it was nearly impossible for any one of them to quite register what was going on. As Duo flew to the ground after Jay, his vision so saturated with rage, he was hardly aware of how extreme his actions were, even as he proceeded to pummel the cringing old man with an intense anger drawn by both what Jay had done to Heero and thoughts of his own upbringing. Meanwhile, Odin and Mother Superior were crowding through the doorway in a desperate rush to stop Duo before he did any real damage.

"How does that feel, fucker?" roared Duo as he hauled Jay up by the lapels of his jacket. He punched Jay savagely in the face and shouted again: "I said, 'How the fuck does that feel?'" The crunch of cartilage was audible throughout the room as another one of Duo's punches connected with Jay's nose, even as Odin desperately tried to restrain the enraged boxer's flailing arms.

All this while, Heero sat on the bed watching the spectacle with eyes that were wide with surprise and confusion. In all his years, he'd never seen a soul stand up to Jay - not even Odin. He could tell that there was an unruly passion driving Duo's actions, and though he could see that his longhaired companion had easily overpowered Jay, his heart clenched as Odin and Mother Superior threatened to reverse the odds with their intervention. However, it was the sight of Odin laying his hands on Duo with the same ferocity he knew so well that compelled something in Heero, and he was almost immediately on his feet and striding towards the fray, unable to bear the sight any longer. Without a word, he crept up behind Odin and flung his arms around his father's neck in a violent choke hold, pressing down with all his might, almost as if he actually intended to force the life out of Odin's lungs.

In all of this, Jay had somehow managed to clamber to his feet, and though it was almost pathetic the way he had to rely on his cane to hobble towards them, he was able to get near enough to Heero to reach out with his cruel, metallic appendage and clamp down on the pressure point at the base of Heero's neck. Almost instantaneously, Heero's crushing arms fell limp around Odin's neck and fell to dangle uselessly against his thighs. At once, Jay used his cane to land a swift blow across the backs of the dazed Heero's knees, which sent the poor boy sprawling to the ground, while Odin, with his renewed strength, fought to restrain Duo from doing any more harm by pinning his arms behind his back.

Now standing like a triad of overbearing conquerors, the adults surrounded the floored Heero and glared down at him with all the derision and smugness of a gang of bullies in the sandbox. Taking up the reins as their spokesperson, Jay ordered his son to gather his things immediately. "I'll drag you back even if you're screaming the entire way," he spat, nudging Heero's body with the foot of his cane as Odin and Mother Superior looked on grimly. "After you're punished for what you stole, you'll go back to double your usual regiment to make up for the time you wasted lollygagging around here."

The unabashed cruelty that Jay showed to Heero, perhaps shadowed only by the indifference of the other two, was only making Duo's rage spike even higher. Though still under Odin's power, the longhaired boxer was already calculating what his next course of action ought to be. Years of dancing around the boxing ring had been building up entirely to this one, singular moment, which seemed as though it would command the whole of Duo's intuitive repertoire with his fists. He hitched his breath, waiting for his moment to strike.

On the floor, Heero was hardly about to give in. Lifting himself up on his forearms, he glared angrily up at his oppressive caretakers, all the hate in the universe branding his scowling features. Contemptuously he growled, "I'll never take orders from you again." His sincerity burned in the depths of his eyes.

Odin, easily riled by his son's insolence, was quick to react: "You'll do as your told out of respect for those who have borne you!" he shouted, jerking the captive Duo around in such a way that Duo knew the time had come.

With almost seamless movement, Duo yanked his hands free and spun around on one light toe, a fist already poised to deal with his subjugator. Odin stumbled back as Duo's knuckles connected roughly with the bottom of his jaw, but Duo hardly took notice as he flew at the true target of his fury. Fists still swinging, Duo assaulted Jay with a fierce jab to the face before instinctually grabbing at Jay's cane and tearing it away. No longer able support himself upright, Jay's ensuing fall was almost immediate, but Duo hardly felt he'd had his just desserts, even as the old man shattered to the ground. Brandishing the cane like a baseball bat, Duo descended upon Jay with it, wielding it down with a series of savage blows that resonated with the dull crack of breaking bones.

"You little shit!" Odin was gasping from a few paces off, clutching his jaw angrily. It wasn't long before he was clawing for Duo, desperate to exact revenge upon him. Keeping Duo from injuring Jay any further seemed to be only a convenient subset of Odin's action as he snatched Duo's wrists just as the boxer was winding up to let the cane smash upon Jay once more. Crushing a forearm into the small of Duo's back, Odin pulled Duo's arms backwards, twisting them awkwardly in their sockets and bending the poor boy uncomfortably over his fist.

Not about to let Odin carry on like that, Heero started to clamber to his feet, his intention clear as the blue in his eyes, but Duo wouldn't stand for it. "Get the fuck out of here, Heero!" he urged through gritted teeth as he struggled to break free.

But, despite his confidence in Duo's ability to take care of himself, Heero was hesitant to leave Duo in such a dire predicament, and he dawdled uncertainly in his place, even as Duo strained out more firmly: "Goddammit, Heero! Don't tell me all this fucking mess was for shit and just go!"

Knowing Duo was right, Heero glanced down at the floor, where Jay was writhing in pain, and then back at Duo, whose attention was now focused solely on giving Odin the thrashing of a lifetime. In that moment, the weight of the fact that Duo was fighting for him truly impacted Heero for the first time. The realization somehow dribbled down into Heero's feet, and they began to move of their own accord, faster and faster as instinct began to take over and he hurried towards the door.

He was nearly there when a pressure like a collar being clamped around his neck closed around his throat with the sound of pulling fabric. Stumbling to a halt, Heero glanced fearfully over one shoulder to find Mother Superior just behind him with a handful of his shirt tightly in one fist. "You were told Duo Maxwell was someone to avoid, Heero," she said with eerie grimness.

Heero stared at her, horrified, but not so much because of what she said as much as how audacious he found her behaviour. Wordlessly, he rolled one shoulder and took a bold step forward - a step so strong, it felt like it was his first - and broke free of her hold with a satisfying rip of his shirt as he pulled away. Then he banged the door open and took off down the hall, running like the Devil was on his heels.

++++

His back was cramped against the wooden baseboard and his hair kept getting tangled in the springs of Duo's sagging mattress, but Heero hardly paid those inconveniences any mind. For him, there were very few places he'd ever felt safe, and the shadowy hollow beneath Duo's bed lent a certain air of familiarity that he hadn't found anywhere else at Saint Magdalena's, though he was unsure whether it was more to do with the hiding places he was accustomed to back on the moon or the fact that the place was rife with Duo. The bed he liked to hide under at Jay's house was an old, rickety thing in the attic that stood in about a centimeter of dust and a pocket of blue shadow, whereas here, he felt more as if he'd burrowed his way into a warm, sepia blanket, surrounded by the chaos of Duo's possessions. A few stacks of intriguing books Heero was surprised to note were of interest to Duo loomed nearby, as well as the remains of what was probably once a sandwich of some kind. There was a pair of hideous uniform shoes that didn't look like Duo had worn in years down there too, and Heero had no intention of nudging them out of hiding, mostly because he had been quick to discover that they were guarding a couple of dirty boy magazines that Heero refused to acknowledge he was curious about.

The jangling of keys outside the door suddenly made Heero stiffen, calming only when he remembered that Duo was the only one who still had free access to the room since Trowa had lost his. Still, Heero didn't let out his captured breath until he heard the familiar thwap of Duo's flip-flops in the darkened room. In the hazy half-light, Heero could make out the silhouette of Duo's shapely calves as he moved across the room; there was a click as he turned up the table lamp by his bed, then the gentle clink of the keys as he laid them down next to it. The floorboards creaked beneath his feet as he shifted his weight, pausing as if like he was surveying the room before he let his guard down enough to make himself comfortable on the ground. The bed frame shifted as he leaned back against it, his arms flopping limply at his sides, knuckles bruised and bloody from fighting.

Heero remained still, wondering if Duo had even realized he was there, until Duo's nearest hand slid under the bed, instinctively searching for him. Without hesitation, Heero moved one of his own to cover it, driven by both urge to protect Duo and personal need. His lips quirked into a tiny smile when he felt Duo's hand flinch warmly in response to his touch.

"They called an ambulance for your family," Duo summed up tersely. "I broke your dad's arm and your grandfather couldn't stand up." There was a momentary silence as he caught his breath again and then whispered, "So now they'll leave you alone for a while, at least."

This announcement called Heero back into the open. "But what will happen to you?" he demanded to know as he dragged himself out on his belly and clambered up into a sitting position beside Duo.

Duo was still staring across the room at the window over Trowa's tightly made bed, though it was doubtful he was actually seeing anything beyond it. His lips moved when he spoke, but there was a quality in his voice that made it sound disembodied. "They're gonna cloister me like a goddamn monk for a month or so," he explained flatly. "It'll be like being in fucking solitary confinement or something, stuck on my knees to beg God to forgive me for something I didn't even do wrong." His voice choked and grew more impassioned as he went on, his hands clenching into tight fists. "I didn't do anything wrong! In fact, I don't think I've ever done anything more right in my life, dammit! God should fucking thank me for what I did!"

Heero was at a loss for what to say, unsure that even the most eloquence in the world would be enough to express what was going through his mind at that exact moment. He gripped Duo's hand tighter and pressed himself flush against Duo's side as he stared hopelessly down at the floor, all the while wondering what he'd ever done to deserve such dedication from Duo. Absently, he mumbled, "The one who really should be the first to thank you is me."

Duo's entire body coiled at the mention of it, too flustered to admit that Heero's approval meant more than anyone else's. "I-It was nothing," he wrote off casually. "I'd carry you to the stars if I could."

Another lingering silence fell between them, thickened only by the buzzing cicadas outside and the echo of Heero's fingertips drumming against the floorboards. "I'll get there somehow," he said at length, at first entranced by the rhythm of his digits. Then he lifted his chin and inclined his head to lean against Duo's shoulder, adding softly, "This time we can really learn to fly if we start running right now. We can jump together and I...." His voice stopped abruptly, suddenly afraid that completing his thought would become as dangerous as breathing heavily on a delicate flame.

Mesmerized by Heero's impassioned speech, Duo rolled his shoulder gently, hoping to urge Heero onwards, but Heero had already started to back-peddle from the heart of it with astonishing speed. Hoping to comfort Heero a little, Duo said, "You know you don't always have to keep running."

Heero pulled back so he could meet Duo's eyes, which were awash with a sort of nostalgic sadness. He felt as if he were staring into the glassy face of a mirror. It was like the sadness Heero usually felt compelled towards resided just as heavily in Duo as it did him. He wondered if his familiarity with loneliness was why Duo hardly felt a stranger, even in the short time they'd known each other.

"I used to run and hide all the time," Duo went on, leveling with Heero's gaze. "I thought maybe if I ran fast enough, I could escape all my problems, but no matter what, I still never managed to get away." Duo bent his head back like he was trying to make the wetness in his eyes drip back into his skull. "Maybe I was just too slow: I was still always covered with dust and sorrow."

Heero was staring at Duo's profile, profoundly struck by the bare season that seemed to weather his face. "I suppose you just have to ask yourself what is it you want to change?" he ventured. "If you're alive, then it's up to you, you know."

Duo was shaking his head skeptically as he said, "How do we even know if we're alive at all?"

Heero opened his mouth to respond, but quickly decided that it was of no use defining one's vitality by a pulse or a lungful of air. After all, even for him, it had only been recently that he'd felt as if he was breathing on his own. Instead, he found his fingers creeping across Duo's sweat-soaked shirt and up around the curve of his jaw, across his round cheek, praying his touch would be stronger than his vaporous words. He felt a pleasant tingle in his fingers as Duo turned his cheek into his caress, even as they brushed across the bruises that marred his skin. There was something ethereal about the gesture that seemed somehow both stronger and far more precious than even the more intimate moments they'd had - as if they were breathing each other in.

"Is that what it feels like?" Duo whispered as his eyelids fluttered delicately over his darkened eyes. He'd never been struck with a pleasure quite like this before, and it seemed to him as if Heero was an angel descended from Heaven to release him from the physical world's miseries.

"I... I don't know," Heero whispered back. His hand was trembling even as he laid it to rest against the side of Duo's face. Whatever it was, he just wanted to share it with Duo as long as possible. Yet, despite the uncertainty with which he was hanging on, he was sure this was right - that here beside Duo was where he belonged. He wondered if it could ever be this real forever.

It was a dream he hoped he would never have to wake from.

++++

[last]
[next]