Title: Catholic Schoolboys Rule!
Author: Link Worshiper
Pairings: 1=2, 3=4, mentions of others
Stuff: AU, pokes at religious institution, fluff/sap, angst, lemon topping and a bit of drag XD
Disclaimer: Gundam Wing belongs to Sunrise, Bandai and a lot of other people who aren't me. +5 skill points if you guess the title reference.

Filling a request for Rainya, because she feeds my geek needs. Thanks to Natea for the once-over.

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XVIII.

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He remembered firm hands around his waist as he was lofted up into the air, the twin medals his father had just looped around his neck clinking out of his shirt collar as he spread his arms like a shuttle plane. Back then, while his face was still round with youth, his hair hardly reached his shoulders and his father still loved him as much as his brother. He could still hear the words clearly, as if they'd been spoken yesterday, and he remembered feeling like, even if he should slip from that strong grip, he might be able to fly.

"Daddy is so proud of you, Duo...."

Duo's eyes snapped open, his body immediately stiff with tension as he stared up at the plain ceiling over his bed in his cloistered apartment above the chapel. Even when it was mostly hung with the shadows of nightfall, it was so different from the room he shared with Trowa. This place was simpler and quieter, yet it was hard to say which one was more comforting to look up at, and found himself wondering if it wasn't where he lay that mattered, but with whom. "Unfamiliar ceiling," he murmured emptily, wilting back into the pillow.

He was alone.

When he'd come storming back to the school after the incident at the pawn shop, he'd delivered the spoils of his errands to Sister Strom and then fell back on the inexplicable assumption she'd made that he wasn't feeling well. Pardoned for as long as he needed to recover, Duo had flown up to his temporary quarters in a huff and locked himself in with his medals to brood. With the lights off in his darkening room, he'd laid on the cot with the medallions pressed to his chest as he tortured himself with thoughts of the limitless potential he had so long as he never rose from that spot.

This unforeseen upset made him want to just abandon it all for good, and once again, he found himself thinking about Heero and his offer to take him to L3 with him. He had held onto his bruising faith for so long, and now he was starting to find it hard to believe. But could he really discard everything just to change the scenery? And yet, the thought of Heero left him imagining how escaping with him just might bring him back to life. But since Heero had entered his life, Duo had felt a new strength that was so different from the brute force of his fists he was used to relying on for so long.

Rolling over onto his side, he tried to tell himself not to think about it, but it was to no avail. Twisting his arms against his chest, he tried turning onto his other side and was frustrated to find it no better. Marooning himself in his room like this was quickly becoming a rather negative way to deal with the situation, and he soon began to wonder if he could slip out to go knocking on Heero's door. He wondered if Heero would mind.

It wasn't long before Duo had made his decision and was soon stealing down the hall towards the boys' dormitories as the rest of the school was beginning to wind down and turn in for the night. He hoped that he wouldn't run into Hilde or any of her other friends along the way, knowing all too well that it would just send him storming down a path he wasn't sure he was ready to just yet.

Duo was standing in front of Heero's dorm just as the sun had finally set beyond the horizon, leaving the halls dark and eerie. Duo's knuckles rapped the diamond-ribbed square of moonlight cast on the door, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable with himself. What if Heero wasn't there, or maybe was too busy for him? He knocked a bit louder.

There was a surprised yelp from within, and it amused Duo to think that he'd startled Heero of all people. He could hear the frantic sound of a chair being scraped back across the hardwood floor and hurried footfalls approaching the door. The deadbolt twisted back and the door cracked open to reveal one of Heero's dark blue eyes shining in the moonlight. "Who is it?" he whispered suspiciously into the darkened hallway.

"It's just me, Heero," Duo answered a bit sheepishly. "Just me..."

"Oh," Heero sighed. He paused and then added, "One minute." The door closed again, leaving Duo by himself once more. He sighed, desperately wishing they didn't have to be strangers in places where others might see them and lovers only while they slept, but he supposed there was no other way. He wanted Heero to feel comfortable around him - about their relationship. He wanted them to be perfect.

After a few moments of pondering, though, Duo realized Heero was taking quite some time. He knocked again, softly calling out to him: "Heero, are you alright in there?" Duo reached for the door handle and turned it, giving the door a gentle push to herald his entrance into the room. "You don't have to worry about being modest for me," Duo rambled on as he started to open the door further. "Unless you're trying to chase out your roommates or something...." He glanced up to see Heero fully dressed with his back towards the door fiddling with something on his bed. "Heero?"

Heero physically jumped at the sudden proximity of Duo's voice and then whirled around, an animalistic, frightened expression frozen in his dark blue eyes. Confused, Duo stared back at him, noting that the thing Heero had been messing with had been his suitcase. "Heero?" he pressed again before a disheartening realization set in upon him. "Are you... leaving?"

Visibly calming a bit, Heero turned towards his suitcase and snapped the clasps shut. "Yes," he murmured mostly to himself.

"Tonight? Right now?" Duo closed the door behind him with audible force, clearly unsettled by this announcement.

"Soon. I have to," Heero answered, pulling the suitcase off the mattress and laying it on the floor before toeing it back underneath the bed. He tiredly ran his fingers through his hair, which looked even more tousled than usual, and then rubbed his eyes as he sat down on the edge of the bed. "They'll come to get me as soon as my grandfather can leave the hospital, I know it. I can't stay much longer or everything I've done will have been for nothing." He paused for a moment, staring down at his bare feet as if he were unsure if he ought to ask the question that was on his mind. "Have you... decided if you want to come with me?"

Duo faltered, balking at the straightforwardness of the question. Despite all the thinking he'd done about the matter, he suddenly felt unsure of what he should say and delayed his answer by swallowing audibly and chewing his bottom lip. He could feel his recovered medallions beneath his oxford shirt, cool against his bare chest, and the knowledge of their presence helped find him the peace of mind to answer with the most sincerity he'd ever mustered. "Anywhere," he said; "I'll go anywhere with you."

A smile that was somehow both relieved and melancholy traced Heero's lips. "I'm glad," he breathed.

Seeing such pleasure on Heero's face roused a similar feeling within Duo, and he could hardly resist striding towards Heero to lay a tender kiss on his lips. He was glad to feel Heero react warmly beneath him, knowing that the gesture spoke far more eloquently than any words could. "I don't know where you find the strength to keep swinging the way you do," Duo murmured as he pulled away, his hands still cupping Heero's face. "It's like nothing holds you down, Heero Yuy."

Heero mumbled something unintelligible and cast his eyes away, his turned cheek pushing Duo's hands away. Concerned, Duo moved to sit next to Heero on the bed, tentatively parking a hand on the mattress behind the other boy as he leaned in to ask what was wrong.

A breath hitched in Heero's throat. "It's you," he repeated in a clearer voice, still afraid to meet Duo's eyes. "I'd have otherwise left this place a long time ago, and yet, all I think about is you." He leaned forward on his elbows, digging them almost forcefully into his thighs. "I've always been quick to discard people to change the scenery, and yet, for some reason..." At last, he turned to look at Duo as he finished softly, "For some reason, I can't seem to let you go."

"Maybe," Duo whispered slowly, hesitantly lifting his hand to rest on the small of Heero's back; "Maybe you just don't want to."

Heero allowed Duo to draw his hand along the length of his spine, though he remained hunched over his knees contemplatively. His eyes slipped closed as if he were simply trying to absorb the warmth of Duo's touch, but it was clear that there was a storm of thought brewing in his mind. Almost absently, he wondered aloud, "If anyone else were me, would they have done the same?"

The question posed a moment of confusion for Duo, and he stopped stroking his back long enough to quirk an uncertain eyebrow at him.

Heero swallowed, clearly uneasy with the discussion, though he made no move to derail it. "I suppose I mean, would anyone else have gone to such great heights to get away?" he continued. "Or am I just chasing a whimsy?"

Duo frowned and slipped his arm comfortingly around Heero's waist. "I don't think anyone's happiness should be a passing whimsy, Heero."

"I just sometimes wonder if I was wrong," Heero finally stated more firmly, at last getting to the heart of the matter. "If perhaps everything I've done was just... wrong." He suddenly snapped his hands to his forehead, burying his face into his palms as he grimaced: "I'm such a fuck-up, Duo! A selfish, selfish fuck-up!"

The outburst clawed right at Duo's chest and he snapped back adamantly, "Bullshit!" He grabbed Heero fiercely by the shoulders and jerked him around so they were sitting face-to-face on the bed. "Goddamit, don't say that shit," he begged of Heero. "If you don't believe in the sincerity of your actions - if you don't believe in yourself - then who will?"

Heero was shaking his head back and forth as if he were trying to physically shake the words out of his mouth. "But that was all before I realized how you make me feel, Duo!" he protested fiercely. "God, if only you knew how different it is now -"

"Who cares? What should matter is right now, here, and fuck all that other shit! To sit still would be a sin!" Duo cut in sharply, his fingers digging into Heero's shoulders. He leaned forward to press another kiss on Heero's lips, this one far more urgent and pleading than the previous one.

"I'm worried you will," Heero uttered softly against Duo's mouth in the pause they took for a breath. "If I fall from your grace, you'll leave me too."

Duo stared back at him, his eyes softened by the weight of Heero's words. "You're asking me if my feelings would change... I don't know," he answered, his gaze unwavering. "But what I do know is that I don't want to leave you now, not for anything. It's the best I can give you - it's all I have."

Moments later, they were kissing again and Duo was guiding Heero down onto his back. Heero lay sprawled across his mattress as Duo's mouth caressed his cheek and jaw, soon wandering down his long neck and exploring the skin beneath the clothing Duo was slowly peeling away. Duo paused only long enough to unbutton his own collar as the heat between them began to elevate, his twin medallions falling free and landing heavily on Heero's chest as he bent forward to return to his prior ministrations. Heero let his eyes slip closed, panting a bit now and allowing himself to revel in the moment: he would enjoy it as if they would never lay together like this again.

Between Heero's strong thighs, Duo wanted to give him nothing but pleasure. The gentle kneading he'd ministered through Heero's uniform pants as they'd kissed had left the fabric moist and warm and he wanted to feel more of it. Eagerly, he fumbled with the buttons of Heero's pants, fervently scrabbling for his prize. It didn't take him long to command a firm grip over Heero's quivering cock, which was now bare and hard in his palm. Stroking it with a familiarity that seemed to deliver Duo just as much pleasure as it did Heero, they were soon lost in a hushed, breathy chorus of tiny mewls and gasps as their touching became more and more intimate.

"You don't mind doing this?" Duo asked breathlessly, propping himself over Heero with one bent elbow as his otherwise occupied hand began to investigate the other sinful lust to be found down there.

Though Heero remembered how nervous and uncertain he'd been that first time they'd tried this in the chapel, now, he was far more concerned with simply being with Duo in any way possible. With a throaty sigh, he breathed his consent, arching his back in pleasure as Duo almost immediately pressed a slick finger deep within him. In that moment, he threw away any care or fear that had ever weighed him down, certain for the first time in his life that love might actually be a true, palpable thing, even with the weight of his guilt pressing down upon his chest. He whimpered ardently as Duo continued to tease him with his expert touch, drawing from his loins a double-edged euphoria unlike any he'd ever known.

"Do you want more of that, my prince?" Duo whispered upon Heero's cheek, their bodies rocking against each other with mounting passion. Their rhythm echoed Duo's thrusting fingers, despite the ragged off-tempo moans warbling deep in Heero's throat. Duo took Heero's impassioned cries as a sign to bring their copulation to its climatic finale, and at long last, he maneuvered himself into a better position to guide his sizable, aching cock between Heero's legs. "Tell me how badly you want it," Duo gasped, barely able to control himself as he held himself there. "Tell me you want me... please... just tell me...."

Heero could only open his mouth with a wanton gasp, but God, how he wanted to say it - how desperately he wanted to tell Duo how good it felt, to beg for him - to tell Duo that he loved him. Lifting his arms to wrap them firmly around Duo's neck, he could only nod, praying the words he couldn't say in a flurry of garbled sounds that rolled off his tongue like a language that was all his own. It was only by the grace of a miracle that he was finally able to shout a coherent word of affirmation to the ceiling amid his strangled moans, and with that, Duo buried himself within Heero's body even more deeply than he'd ever dreamed of going.

Tears dotting the corners of his eyes, Heero was only aware of the pleasure burning between his thighs, maddened by the delicate pain and eager to feel more of it in the brief interludes when Duo would draw back only to thrust back harder and faster than before. With each penetration, Heero threw his head back and roared with ecstasy, his dull fingernails clawing ferociously into Duo's shirt and tearing at the damp cotton. Heero's legs were locked with ferocious strength around Duo's hips as if it were he who was keeping Duo prisoner, forcing Duo to fuck him at a pleasingly violent pace of his own discretion. The gritty dirtiness of it all was somehow what made the moment ever more godly, a sacredness he could taste on Duo's very skin. He hadn't realized how badly he'd wanted this from Duo - how badly he'd needed it. It was almost agonizing to think of being apart, now that a touch would hardly be enough for him after this.

Their climax came far too soon, abruptly bringing them crashing down into a ragged pile of panting bodies sprawled across the mattress. Heero clutched Duo's sweaty, virile body as close to his own as he could, nuzzling the crook of his neck with what he hoped would be understood as affection. It was no wonder he'd found peace through Duo this way, but his bandaged heart ached at the knowledge that it was far more than he deserved.

"Did you like that?" Duo whispered, rolling them onto their sides so they lay facing each other. He reached to draw a matted lock of dark brown hair out of Heero's eyes and smiled warmly to lean in and place a kiss on Heero's brow.

Heero still could only nod, though the reciprocating smile that molded his lips spoke volumes more than any words could, though the mere thought of what they'd just done was already making him hard again, much to Duo's pleasure and amusement. "I want more," he gasped as Duo's hands started to wander down the length of his body again. "Slower... deeper," he begged, spreading himself back across the mattress and pulling Duo after him. He touched Duo's face gingerly and breathed, "I want it to last forever."

Duo chuckled, his warm laughter rolling through his chest in a way that pleased Heero to touch. With that cocksure grin of his in place, Duo mounted Heero much more assertively, gyrating his hips into his lover's with agonizing force and tempting him with a promise of just that: "Then I'll torture you all night, my prince," he purred.

"Aa," Heero whimpered, the emptiness within him already threatening to swallow him whole. His eyelids fluttered closed as he reveled in the feel of Duo against him once more. "Aa...."

Succumbing to Duo's touch once more, Heero freed himself of his inhibitions, and with Duo in his arms, everything else seemed to evaporate away. He could hear nothing save Duo's voice and Duo's panting, knew only the feel and scent of him, as if the world was turning only for them. He felt he had been waiting his whole lifetime to feel this way, and if he were to die right there, he might die a happy person. Maybe one day he'd have enough to gamble and bet it all.

If only he hadn't been lying in the shadows of the walls he'd already built around himself.

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Heero woke the next morning with a sense of urgency. He snapped bolt upright in bed, upsetting his sheets and Duo's lazy slumber with the suddenness of his movements. "Where's the fire?" Duo mumbled as he slowly opened his eyes and stretched.

The anxiety that had sent Heero rocketing awake was quickly squirreled away and replaced with concern of a different sort: "What time is it?" he asked, glancing down at Duo, who, apart from rolling over, had barely made any move to get out of bed. His eyes moved to the clock on bedside table that sat between his bed and Quatre's, vaguely wondering where the blonde was before checking the time. He was relieved to note there was still some time before morning prayers, albeit not as much as he would have liked.

"Bet Trowa's really been taking advantage of his sudden single-dorm status," Duo commented, sitting up at last and nodding towards Quatre's untouched bed. He stared blandly at the school-issued blankets tucked around Quatre's mattress and then murmured thoughtfully, "I wonder what will happen when it comes time for him to leave, too."

It was strange, but it was something Heero had never given much pause to think about, and now that he had, he found himself almost feeling like he was luckier in some regards. Here, if he could only manage to leave as soon as possible, he'd be able to slip away with Duo to start a new life without anyone being any wiser for it; meanwhile, the similarly developing relationship between Trowa and Quatre seemed destined for more unhappy ends, with Quatre ultimately destined to return to his overprotective father and Trowa uninterested in disrupting his settled life. Heero thought if he were a better person, he might try to do something about it, but he felt his hands were probably too dirty to meddle. "It's their business, I guess," Heero summed up halfheartedly.

"Just like how you're my business?" Duo asked, waggling his eyebrows. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, buttoning his medallions back underneath his rumpled shirt.

"Something like that," Heero answered with a shrug as he went about pulling fresh underclothes from one of the drawers. He stripped and put them on without shame, even with the knowledge that Duo was eying him lecherously as he did so. Amazingly enough, it was knowledge he really didn't mind.

Once they were both decent enough to venture out into the halls, they left for morning prayers walking side-by-side with their shoulders pressed together. Sometimes Duo's hand would twitch towards Heero's like he meant to grab it, but they both fought to quell the urge to do so. A public display of their relationship probably wasn't well suited for Saint Magdalena's, though in the past, Duo had once taken pleasure in his enjoyment of things that set the institution off. But that had been for the sake of empty statements and he didn't want to risk losing Heero now.

The chapel was already starting to fill up by the time they got there, which was fortunate since the throngs of students would help mask Duo slip back to his post without anyone catching on to the fact he'd not spent the night where he was expected to. Inside, they cruised down one of the side aisles in an attempt to locate some of their friends before Duo had to go off and sit alone for the service. It wasn't long before they found Trowa, Quatre, Wufei and his sort-of girlfriend, Meilan, occupying one of the benches in the middle of the nave. "I'll see you later," Duo said, clapping Heero affectionately on the back as as Heero plopped down beside Quatre on the end of the pew.

"Later," Heero called back, his quiet voice nearly getting swallowed by the chatter around them as Duo walked off towards the Madonna's niche. He settled back against the pew, taking the moment to space out a little as he tried to figure out how he should feel about his predicament.

Duo was hardly gone a moment when another voice cut into his thoughts. "Heero," he heard, and he turned to find himself looking up at Relena, who was now standing in the place Duo had been just a minute before. "Heero, I have a question for you."

Heero only half listened to her as she proposed an opportunity for him to read some sort of contribution for an upcoming feast day mass. He nodded absently to her, knowing he was agreeing to something he'd never have to do if everything went according to plan and he and Duo were out of this place by the week's end.

"Wonderful!" Relena exclaimed, hardly able to keep herself from clapping her hands together with glee. For a second, it seemed like she was trying to decide if it would be alright for her to sit with Heero and the others, but she seemed hesitant to. Folding her hands against her skirt again, she couldn't help but ask, "Will Duo be joining you?"

"Huh?" Heero snapped to attention at Duo's name. "Oh, no, he can't...."

"Sure didn't stop him last night," Quatre murmured under his breath to Trowa and Wufei, who both smirked darkly at the comment.

Relena leaned a bit so she could see the others standing beside Heero. Confusion was written all across her face. "I'm sorry?"

Quatre, Trowa and Wufei all shook their heads while both Heero and Meilan shot them stagnant glares. Relena seemed a little uneasy, standing on the border of what was clearly a huge inside joke.

"If you're asking to sit with us," Quatre went on, "I'm sure Duo wouldn't mind a princess standing with his prince."

A snort drew attention towards Trowa and Wufei, who were both fighting hard to stifle laughter at Quatre's commentary. Meilan was rolling her eyes and Heero's face was both horrorstruck and red with embarrassment as the realization sunk in that they were all well aware of what he and Duo had been up to the night before.

"Good thing I now have a spare bed in my room Wufei could sleep in," Trowa said between barely contained laughs. "Otherwise, he'd have been sleeping in the hall!" He was barely able to get out the last word before his amusement overtook him and he grabbed his sides as he outright guffawed. The sight was certainly uncanny.

Heero shoved his hands deep into his pockets, nervously glancing towards Relena, who, he noted drolly, seemed remarkably unfazed by the clear allusions laced into the rampant joking. "Don't make me ask where you slept last night, Quatre," Heero said flatly.

"Discretion, Heero," Quatre chided smugly. "It might do to learn its value."

Ironically uncaring of its repercussions, Heero was just short of informing him just how damn inconspicuous he was naturally capable of being before an unexpected comment from Relena silenced him abruptly: "It's sound advice," she said ambiguously, her eyes tracking something unseen on the ceiling. Heero could only stare at her, flabbergasted and at a loss to what she might have been insinuating.

She seemed to have noticed Heero's unwavering stare, and she blinked back at him, a little startled. Then, a small smile appeared on her face as she laid one arm across her lap and placed her chin in the upturned palm of her other hand, nonchalantly commenting, "You know they're just happy for you, right?" Her easy pose fell apart when she suddenly realized she no longer had one stare focused on her, but rather five instead. "Well, that's the truth, isn't it!?" she protested at her new audience.

Unsurprisingly, it was Quatre who broke the awkward tension first. "Are you?" he asked, his tone amazingly serious for someone who had just been cracking jokes moments before. It was clear he had figured out that she was well aware of what was under discussion.

Relena supposed she shouldn't have been as surprised by the question as she appeared to be, though it still took her a few moments to recover. She met Quatre's eyes briefly and then drew back to find them all waiting intently for her response. Their expectant faces were lined up like identical soldiers, and she found what truly surprised her was the fact that Heero's seemed to meld unobtrusively in with the rest of them, and it was in that moment that she realized how much she'd previously embellished him in her mind. With Duo's presence inevitably lingering amid the lot of them, it was suddenly very clear to her how this clique related to one another in a way she wasn't sure she would ever fully understand: they were far more rough-and-tumble than she was - realists all so mired within themselves that it was only through extreme detachment that they were able to find a connection. That wasn't her, a person far better placed at her age with ideals and dreams that still somehow seemed tangible.

"Well?" said one of them. She wasn't quite sure which.

She tried to glance at Heero one last time but found it wasn't of any use, so she simply sighed and spoke as earnestly as she could: "Who am I to take away someone else's happiness simply for the benefit of my own?" she said. Dropping her gaze to her shoes, she murmured mostly to herself, "Even winning against Dorothy isn't worth that."

It was a profound moment for her, even if its poignancy was drowned out by the tolling of the iron bell as it called the faithful to their knees.

++++

Meanwhile, Duo's morning had taken a far more sour turn as he'd made his way down the side aisle to the Madonna's niche. On his way there, a usually friendly voice calling out to him fell harsh upon his ears, and he whipped around angrily to find Hilde waving eagerly to him from the end of the pew he'd just sauntered passed. She seemed completely ignorant of what he'd so recently discovered, but it wouldn't remain that way for much longer. Stalking back up the aisle, he grabbed her arm in a ferocious way that startled her as he growled darkly, "You've got a lot of fucking nerve, you bitch."

It didn't take long for Hilde to turn defensive: "What the hell is your problem?" she hissed back, trying to wrench her arm free.

"What the hell is yours?" Duo demanded to know, jerking her out into the aisle. "How could you betray me the way you did and still call yourself my best fucking friend?"

Her eyes narrowed as she glared back at him. With another hard yank of her arm, she managed to wrest herself free as she huffed darkly, "You have a lot of explaining to do, Duo Maxwell - and it better be fucking good."

"I could say the same to you," Duo snapped. Glancing around, he noticed they were starting to gain a bit of attention, so he snatched her arm up again and started to drag her with him to the Madonna's niche, which was at least a bit more secluded. When they got there, he pushed her onto one of the pews and then leapt onto the one in front of it, crouching backwards on the bench as he glowered at her. "So start talking, and do it slow so I can stop you when you start spewing bullshit."

Hilde's mouth opened and closed with dumfounded silence as she stared back at Duo. The only thing she could think of the say was, "I have no idea what this is about, Duo."

"Fuck you! Of course you do!" Duo raged, already ripping at his tie so he could unbutton his shirt and rip out his medallions. "Don't tell me you're not surprised to see these, you bitch!"

Hilde raised her eyebrows, but her reaction wasn't nearly as horrified as Duo had expected it to be. Nor was her response to it: "Where did you find those?" she asked, her voice sounding truly intrigued. "I knew you were overreacting when you said you thought they'd been stolen. Really, Duo...."

"There were stolen, dipshit; I found them in a pawnshop," Duo snipped, though he was a lot more subdued than he'd been moments before. He twisted the medallions' chain around his finger as he stared back at her, weighing up the expression on her face as he tried to decide if it appeared sincere or not. At length, he finally said, "You... you really had no idea?"

"No, I didn't, asshole!" she said, her voice sharp with seriousness but also far calmer than it had been when Duo had started throwing accusations at her senselessly. "Don't forget that I had shit go missing on me too."

Duo hardly had to glance at the long winter uniform skirt Hilde was wearing to remember that she still hadn't located her usual spring attire. "I'm sorry," Duo apologized as the reality of what a dick he'd been to jump so quickly to conclusions sunk in. "It's just, with the description I had from the pawn shop guy, the only person I could think of was you...." Now that he thought about it, he recalled also being told that the student who had sold his medallions to the pawnshop was wearing a short skirt, which quickly eliminated Hilde from the pool of suspicion, much to his relief. He sighed audibly: "Jeez, Hilders, you don't know what a relief it is to know that I don't have to worry about trusting my friends."

Hilde still seemed a little hesitant to laugh the whole situation off so easily, but her demeanor was definitely loosening up. "Well, all I ask is that next time, you think a little bit before you start losing your shit," Hilde admonished. Cocking her head, she added thoughtfully, "For instance, maybe if you'd remembered my missing skirt sooner, you'd have more evidence that whoever pawned your medallions is the thief."

Duo nodded thoughtfully at the suggestion, but then pointed out, "Yeah, except for why would someone who already owns the uniform steal a skirt she already has?"

"Unless she wasn't a student," Hilde said astutely. "Or maybe not even a girl. Remember how even you go parading around in one when it strikes your fancy every now and again."

"Oh, just great," Duo bemoaned, clearly not reassured by the notion; "That only narrows it down to the entire town. I'm just about the only guy around here who doesn't have short ass hair." He sunk down on his pew, turning around to face the altar instead of Hilde as he started to brood to himself. He sat for the rest of the morning mass with his chin perched on top of his knuckles as he stared angrily into space.

++++

The rest of Duo's day was spent helping Sister Strom dust, polish, vacuum and straighten everything in the chapel that needing dusting, polishing, vacuuming and straightening. It was mostly tedious work, but Sister Strom let him take breaks whenever he needed it and even let him try and hammer out some John Lennon songs on the organ when he asked. All in all, Duo found the work strangely liberating in its regimented strain, and he wondered if it wasn't what drew people to a life like Sister Strom's after all.

"Did Helen teach you how to play that?" Sister Strom asked during one of Duo's organ interludes. She was making herself busy changing the ceremonial cloth that adorned the nearby altar while Duo tweaked out a simple tune that derived somehow from Instant Kharma.

"She taught me what keys to press to make the different notes. I kind of figured the rest out on my own," Duo answered easily before the weight of the question truly settled in on him. His hands stilled on the organ and his shoulders slumped the more he thought about it. Quietly, he mumbled to himself, "I wonder if she'd miss me."

Sister Strom smoothed the cloth out over the altar and abruptly abandoned the rest of her task to walk over towards Duo, sitting down beside him on the organ bench. "That's silly and you know it: of course she would," she said. "If Helen were to ever have children, she would have loved them the way she loved you."

Duo scoffed bitterly, "You mean the way my dad doesn't?" There was a pause, and then he added, "You know, he still blames me for all that - for Helen going off on her missionary thing and getting killed. It's why he hates me."

Sister Strom eyed Duo firmly and pursed her lips. "Your father does not hate you, Duo."

"Yeah, whatever: you tell him that," Duo said, crossing his arms over his chest and frowning down at the keyboard. "He told me so himself - said I drove her to even go out on that journey in the first place by always annoying her - just like how it's my fault mom isn't alive anymore either! But that's such bullshit!" Duo had forgotten he was speaking to a nun and just let it all come out as he would anywhere else: "Helen told me herself that she was just tired of being the headmistress with a douche like my dad always trying to pull the strings from the wings - that his old fashioned thinking was what kept her from doing anything meaningful with this dump...."

Strom, visually unaffected by the acidity of Duo's rant, merely reached out to put a comforting hand on Duo's shoulder as she said, "Duo, you were very young at the time. You probably just misunderstood what was going on. Maybe it's time to let it all go."

"Not on your life!" Duo retorted, raising his voice and banging a fist into the keyboard with an off-pitch moan from the organ. "He's the one who drove her out because he was jealous she knew how to be a better parent than he ever was. You wouldn't know; you weren't there." He turned away from her on the bench and hunched over. "Dad's too busy being 'religious' to pay attention to me, but Helen - Helen always used to have time. She actually cared if I fell down and hurt myself or if I... if I...." He sniffled a little and wiped his nose, embarrassed he'd started to get upset about the whole thing.

Strom's steady hand had not left Duo's shoulder, even as he'd turned away. Saying nothing, she simply squeezed down, a sad smile on her face as she watched Duo's braid twitch across his hunched back.

"I was a momma's boy, you know? My mom - my real one - she used to think I was God's gift to the world," Duo went on, his voice a little bit steadier now. "I think that bothered dad, because he was always pitting me against Solo, comparing me to him, telling me how I had to measure up to him in every way...." Duo took a moment to swallow and recollect himself, absolutely dogged that he wouldn't cry in front of someone like Sister Strom. "And then mom got sick, and I heard him say it was my fault we couldn't afford the meds she needed because we had to pay for school and stuff. But at least Helen was there, and she'd hug me and it would be okay. She was the only one who ever hugged me after... after...." Duo hiccupped, interrupting his story and impeding him from finding the breath to continue as he buried his face in his palms. Desperately, he tried to suck all the feelings he'd uncapped back down his throat, but he was finding it more difficult than it should have been.

Sympathetically, Sister Strom gave Duo's shoulder another squeeze and stood up, saying, "Duo, if you'd like to take the rest of the day off, that's alright with me. As far as I'm concerned, you've long out-served your punishment." Then she walked away, leaving Duo to collect himself in the privacy of his own mind.

++++

"I'm going to be reluctant to give your keys back to you. It's been really nice not having to live at your beck and call," said Trowa from behind the large box of Duo's things he was carrying down the hallway. He was helping Duo bring the things he'd taken with him to the chapel apartments back to their dorm room now that Sister Strom had officially released Duo from his duties as her assistant. He set the box down next to their door and waited for the other large box bearing Duo's legs and hands approached the place where he stood.

"Yeah, well, next time don't be stupid enough to lose yours," said Duo, putting down his box and reaching out to snatch his key ring from Trowa, who was holding them out to their rightful owner on one of his index fingers. "Say goodbye to your sex life, Tro," Duo said, inserting the appropriate key into the lock and twisting it; "I'm sure Quatre will understand."

Trowa, who was very hard to embarrass, was bright red from head to toe. "That's none of your business, sir!" he said haughtily.

"Well, as your new old roommate, I'm making it my business!" Duo retorted with a large grin, turning around to face Trowa with a hand on each hip. His smug expression quickly snapped into one of surprise as something came to mind: "Oh, I just remembered something I forgot over there," he said, already starting to walk back the way they'd come; "I'll be back in five." Then he took off running, his long braid flapping excitedly behind him.

"Yeah, well, don't expect Heero to understand the same way Quatre might," Trowa called after his friend, careful not to say anything at such a volume that might incriminate the true nature of the relationship Duo shared with Heero. Satisfied that he'd done a decent job of ragging Duo for the time being, he turned back to the door, glad that he could hold onto Duo's keys for that much longer, and tried to turn the handle. "Locked?" he murmured to himself, sure that he'd just seen Duo turn the key moments ago. He tried again, trying to remember if he'd left the door unlocked the last time he'd left. He was usually fairly good at remembering to keep the room secure when he left, though, especially with resounding evidence that there was, indeed, a thief running around the school's campus.

However, when he finally pushed the door open, kicking one of Duo's boxes into the room as he went, he looked up to find a wholly shocking scene. There, sitting on Trowa's bed with the silver pocket watch he usually hid at the bottom of his beside table drawer, was none other than Heero Yuy. "Wh-what the hell is this?" Trowa stammered, dumbfoundedly standing in the doorway as he stared at Heero with wide eyes.

Like a cat with feathers caught in its teeth, Heero startled at the sound of Trowa's voice, snatching the watch out of sight as he turned to stare right back at the intruder. "I thought you had class until dinner," Heero said skittishly.

"I, do but I'm skipping it to help Duo move back here," Trowa retorted, his voice tight. He shook his head, his side-swept hair bouncing into his face with the vigor. "That still doesn't explain what you're doing here," he said, crossing his arms. "Or why you've got your hands on my father's watch!"

"It was on the table; I was going to put it back!" Heero insisted defensively as he demonstratively produced the watch from nowhere and dropped it back into the open drawer of Trowa's bedside bureau. "And Duo let me in," he added as a futile alibi.

"If Duo had been holding onto his keys," Trowa said, holding up Duo's key ring, "I'm sure he would have."

"Would have what?" came the last voice Heero wanted to hear at that moment. The very sound of it made him freeze. Trowa heartlessly stepped out of the doorway without a word so that Duo, who had just reappeared in the hallway, could see what had crept into their dormitory. To say that the mere colour drained from Duo's face at the sight would have been an understatement. "Heero?"

"I can explain!" Heero insisted, suddenly on his feet. There was a desperate, almost wounded expression quivering deep in his blue eyes, but it went unseen.

"You had better," Trowa spat, growing more contemptuous by the second as he noticed something lying on the table. Upon closer inspection, he found the item to be the keys he thought he'd misplaced so long ago, instantly recognizable by the stupid robot keychain he had hanging off of them.

Meanwhile, Duo was still standing in the doorway, clearly suffering some kind of shock, his lips twitching a little bit as he tried to remember how to talk. There was no way this could be! Heero was his angel - the one who was going to help him fly away! Refusing to believe it, Duo slowly backed out of the room, his breathing growing harsher as the pieces began to slide into place against his will. "Impossible!" he shouted, suddenly overwhelmed with the urge to prove himself wrong as he took to speeding back down the hall, but this time with a new destination in mind.

"Duo! Come back! I really can explain!" Heero cried, already starting to move after him. Trowa tried to stand in his way, but Heero didn't care to put up with it for a second and, with a latent strength Trowa didn't realize Heero had, Heero grabbed Trowa by the shirt and seamlessly flung him into the table, where he landed with a painful sounding crack.

Duo was already on the stairs up to the room Heero shared with Quatre and Wufei, deaf to everything around him, including Heero, as he chased after him. Upon reaching the door, he jiggled the doorknob impatiently and then hounded on the door with heavy fists. When that didn't garner the results he desired, Duo threw himself at the door repeatedly until he heard the wood start to splinter around the lock and finally managed to barge into the empty dorm room. He was dimly aware of Heero's arrival as he flew towards the bed he'd woken up in that very morning, but he was a man possessed. Reaching under the bed, he groped until he found the suitcase Heero always kept under there and bashed the locks with his fists until they were also broken, uncaring that his hands were now bruised and bloody. "It can't be! It can't be!" Duo was chanting to himself as he flung the lid open.

But the evidence was clearly lying on top of the folded green material of Hilde's missing skirt: Quatre's wallet and his passport, already half altered to bear Heero's name and personal information; pieces of jewelry and a roll of cash folded around some pink slips presumably from the pawn shop. Duo senselessly rifled through all these things as Heero stood helplessly behind him, his head hung in shame.

When he was through, Duo wordlessly snapped the suitcase shut and stood up with its handle clutched in one hand as he faced Heero with a most ambiguously bland expression. Heero met Duo's eyes with tears lining his, but the emotionless flatness he saw there frightened the words from his throat, and he was left only able to stand there vulnerably.

It was Duo who broke the tense silence, but his voice was cold and hardly a remedy to the iciness in the air. "You lied," he said. "You lied and I thought I fell in love with you - a fake - and then I let you fuck me."

Heero winced at the truth of the words, knowing he deserved Duo's hatred and any violence he wished to bestow upon him. He would have been okay with any of it, even it tore his heart to shreds to think of it.

"I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, huh? A little liar in a long line of cheats and fuckers," Duo said, the cynicism that was starting to show in his voice possibly even worse than the emotionless tone he'd spoken with before. "I thought I'd finally felt what it was like to make love to someone, but I guess I was wrong," he said, turning away to set the suitcase on the bed. "I suppose now I know how every other dick I ever used for a cheap fuck feels." He flipped it open long enough to pull the wad of cash out, which he then lobbed at Heero's feet. "That's what you wanted, right?" he spat. "There, I've paid my whore."

Closing the suitcase, he picked it up again and he stalked passed Heero without even looking at him, even as Heero turned to watch him go with pained eyes. Before he vanished, Duo paused in the doorway long enough to say. "Never speak to me again."

And then he was gone.

"But... I can explain," Heero whispered to the empty room.

However, the moment he was alone, the first tear plopped down the curve of Heero's cheek, splattering on the floor next to his shoe. Then another and another came as he slowly sank to the ground, his heartbeat weakening in his chest with each passing second. He supposed he should have known it was going to come to this at some point and that the only one he could blame was himself. After all, hadn't he come here with the knowledge that allowing himself to grow attached to anyone would only keep him from his objective? He'd never dreamed that his priorities could change so drastically in such a relatively short time when he'd been planning all this for years. But then again, how could he have ever predicted Duo Maxwell?

With a flash of self pity, he found himself wishing that his grandfather and father would come and get him immediately: that they would bring him back to the moon and punish him exactly the way filth like him deserved. How dare he try to wish something as obscene as happiness for himself when all he did was screw things up? There was no way he could move on to a new life knowing what he'd left in ruins behind him. If only Duo could understand how different it was now than when he'd first come.

Crawling back to his bed, he managed to hoist himself up onto the mattress and bury his face into the pillow, which still smelled of Duo's sweat. Smothering himself with it, he curled up in a tight ball and wished desperately that he'd managed to sneak away with Duo sooner, even though the truth of it was that he would haven rather been was dead and that he'd never had to say goodbye to his sweet days, no matter how brief they had been.

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