Title: Right To Remain Silent
Author: ralphiere
Pairing: 1x2x1, suggested 3x4x3
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: sexual situations, only vague knowledge of the law
Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own them in all their non-minor goodness!
Notes: Thanks to my husband for answering my questions about the arrest process. His troubled youth was not in vain!!

Challenge #184 - low

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"This is nothing like it is on TV." Duo tried in vain to make light of the situation, but all he managed to get out of Heero was an irritated scowl as the man walked to the other side of the holding cell and leaned against the wall.

"I'm glad you think this is funny," Heero spat in exasperation, sliding down the wall and sitting on the floor. "How do you think it felt having to call our friends and ask for bail? I can still hear them laughing now."

"Oh, come on Heero, it wasn't that bad." Duo moved to sit next to Heero, relieved when his lover didn't move away. He leaned his back against the cement wall and closed his eyes for a moment. "Did you want me to call them instead?"

Duo didn't open his eyes as he let the silence stretch. He knew Heero was pissed about them getting arrested, but it really wasn't Duo's fault ... entirely. It takes two to tango. Before Duo could repeat his question, he felt Heero's hand on his thigh and opened his eyes. Looking over he could tell that Heero was still irritated, but remarkably not with him.

"No, I'd rather they heard of our new all time low from me, without a detailed play by play." Heero smirked, giving Duo's thigh a gentle squeeze. "Not counting during the war, you're honestly telling me this is the first time you've been arrested, Duo?"

Duo gasped in mock offense, his tone indignant. "What are you insinuating? I've always been too good to be caught!"

Heero chuckled at this, the mood in the cell suddenly lighter. Before he could say more, the door to the cell was sliding open.

"Maxwell, Yuy, your bail's been posted."

They both stood and followed the officer out of the holding tank and up a flight of stairs into the police station. They stopped at the counter and waited for their wallets, belts, keys and shoes to be returned to them before they were given the time and date for their hearings and allowed to leave. Turning, Heero could see Quatre and Trowa standing near the door and he glowered at the amusement on their faces.

"Don't say it," Heero said, holding up his hand and walking by his friends. He just wanted to get the hell out of there before the real embarrassment started. Spotting Trowa's car, he stalked towards it leaving the other three in his wake.

Duo watched as Heero leaned angrily against the car and tried not to smile. He genuinely felt bad about getting arrested, but it really could've been worse - this wasn't the first time they'd done something stupid like this.

"Heero was a bit vague on the phone," Quatre started, looking at Duo and struggling not to smile. "What were you arrested for exactly?"

Stopping, he glanced at Heero before turning to his friends with a grin. "Indecent exposure, lewd and lascivious acts in a public place and ... resisting arrest."

"You were having sex in public?" Trowa snorted, trying not to laugh as he glanced over at Heero. "Where?"

"We weren't exactly having sex." Duo continued to walk, not wanting to push Heero's buttons further. "We'd just gone to the movies and were walking through the park to the subway. The movie had a lot of explosions, and you know Heero... let's just say we tried to blend into the shadows for a little fun. How were we supposed to know a bicycle cop would come by?"

Heero straightened up, and raised an eyebrow at Duo. "If you're going to tell it, tell it all. What happened to the bicycle cop when he saw us?"

Duo started laughing. "I was a bit preoccupied and didn't notice the cop riding up behind me. Heero smacked my head, and when I looked up from where I was kneeling I turned and saw the cop and he fell off his bike."

"Into a rosebush."

"A very thorny rosebush."

Heero couldn't stay irate, and started laughing at the absurdity of the situation. "Duo stood and tried to help the guy get untangled from the bush, but the cop pulled out his gun and started waving it around. He told us not to move."

Duo snickered. "You know Heero, he always follows orders. So instead of ... covering himself, he stood there not moving with his hands raised. I thought the cop was going to burst a blood vessel!" By now Duo was doubled over, tears streaming down his face as he remembered the expression on the cops face.

"You really just stood there ... hanging out?" Quatre sputtered, his eyes wide. He reached for Trowa's keys for the man was in no position to be unlocking the car doors from where he was sitting in the parking lot holding his sides.

"He said 'don't move'," Heero answered seriously, opening the door when Quatre unlocked it and slid into the back seat. "I think it took him five minutes to get untangled from that damned bush, and by the time he'd managed to free himself he'd gotten it into his head that we'd resisted arrest."

Buckling in next to Heero, Duo wiped the tears from of his face. "He even went so far as to handcuff Heero before he realized that Heero's boy was still swinging in the breeze. He was so pissed when Heero suggested that it would be police brutality if the cop tried to put it away for him."

"You did not!" Quatre turned in his seat and stared at Heero.

"I did." Heero sounded indignant, but his lips were quirked in a small smile. "I also suggested that Duo could put it away for me, but the cop decided it best to take the handcuffs off so I could do it myself."

"Luckily that was all sorted out before the cruiser got there. Unfortunately for us the rosebush packed quite a punch and it actually looked like we had resisted arrest. Let's just say they weren't pleased."

Trowa pulled the car out of the parking lot, and they all breathed a sigh of relief as the police station grew smaller in the distance. "I hope you boys learned your lesson," Trowa said in a stern voice, his smirk visible in the rearview mirror.

"Absolutely," Duo answered immediately. "Don't take Heero to a movie with explosions unless I know of a more secluded spot."

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END

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